Back In The Saddle

“So why didn’t you buy a place there?”

“Didn’t miss it that much,” she said, and he smiled.

“What are you going to do with all of this, though?”

“Haven’t decided. Doubt I’ll entertain much, so I don’t feel any pressure to spiff it up. Although the landscaping could stand some tending. You know anybody who could do that?”

“I’ll get you some names.”

“Good. Thanks.” She paused, her hands folded in her lap. “But I’m sure you’re not the only one who wonders why I chose to buy up here.”

“Because of what happened, you mean?”

She smiled. “Let me guess...your brother?”

“When we were discussing the horse, yeah. As for other people wondering about it...” He shrugged. “None of their business. And if anybody gets up in yours...ignore ’em.”

* * *

Looking back, Mallory thought it was almost scary how naive she’d been when she’d first arrived in LA. How easily she’d trusted people she’d later discovered did not deserve that trust. Twenty years on, she was far more cautious. Far less likely to take anyone at face value.

But something about this man resurrected all that old...innocence, she supposed it was. She knew in her bones she was safe with him, that he was as honest and pure as the landscape that had wrapped itself around her soul from the moment she’d seen it.

“I bought a house here,” she said, “because I fell in love with the area fifteen years ago. The accident didn’t change that.”

“Was that before or after the first Transmutant movie?”

A laugh burst from her chest. “After. By several years. But oh, Lord, what I wouldn’t give to expunge those from my history.” She cocked her head. “So you’ve seen them?”

He smiled. “Only one, when I was a teenager. Although I’d apparently expunged it from mine,” he said, and she laughed again, then sighed.

“I was so young. Barely legal. But both Russell—”

“Russell?”

“Eames. My ex. The director?” Zach shrugged, and she smiled. “Anyway...he and my agent swore it was a good deal. And by the third release, it was a very good deal, money-wise.” A hawk fluttering overhead made her look up. “Although by rights I should’ve been pigeonholed as The Hot Chick and my career would’ve been over before I was twenty-five. Russell’s taking a chance on me beyond that, that I could do something different... I was extraordinarily fortunate.”

“No wonder you married him. If he had that much faith in you.”

A smile pushing at her mouth, Mallory looked out over the wooded ravine dropping off twenty feet from the path. “He really did.” Because that much, at least, was true. “And yes, I suppose that was a major reason why I did marry him. Even though everyone thought I was nuts, what with his being only a couple years younger than my father and all. But for a long time, Russ was everything to me. My champion, my protector, not to mention my acting coach...” She released a breath. “For that much, I’ll always owe him a great deal.”

“So what happened?”

She shrugged. And hedged. “Ultimately we couldn’t adjust to our new roles. As simple as that.” Her mouth twisted. “Russell’s new wife is even younger. Gorgeous. Ridiculously smart. Not in the industry. And Landon likes her. You know, now that I think of it, I think I hate her.”

“Can’t imagine why,” Zach said, and she snorted. Then her eyes met his. “It was a damn good run, you know? I had a career most people can only dream about, and God knows I never expected.” Half smiling, she squinted back at the forest. “And no matter what happens from here on out, nobody can take that away from me.”

After some moments, she heard Zach sigh. “I know what you mean. All the good stuff...it really is ours forever, isn’t it?”

“It really is,” she said softly.

“Do you miss it?”

Mallory met his gaze again. “Sometimes. All the insanity that goes with it?” She shrugged. “Not so much. And I don’t only mean what actually goes into making a film. That has its moments, sure. Magical ones, actually, when suddenly a scene comes together...” She smiled. “There’s a reason I kept doing it. Well, other than the fact that I had absolutely no skill for anything else. Aside from barrel racing, that is. But the world of movie-making...it can be hard. And weirdly far less real at times than the make-believe one up on the screen. Even so, I’ll admit to wishing the decision to quit had been mine.”

He leaned one hand against an apple tree trunk, glancing up into the tangled branches before facing her again.

“And now?”

Was it strange, that she understood exactly what he was asking? “It’s funny—at first I worried that after everything I’d worked for, I’d fade into oblivion. That it’d be as though I’d never existed. Then I found myself hoping people would lose interest, move on to the next thing. And yes, you do start to feel like a thing. A commodity. When that didn’t happen, I realized all I wanted was to be left alone to deal with my life in peace. But mostly for Landon to be left alone to live his.”

“That why you left him with his dad?”

There was no censure in his voice. At least none that she could hear. And certainly she saw nothing but compassion in those gentle blue eyes, so calm and steady behind his glasses. Then a short, dry laugh escaped his lips.

“Sorry, what was that I said about people getting up in your business—?”

“It’s okay. And actually it feels good to talk about it.”

“You sound surprised.”

“It’s not something I usually do. Only child and all that.”

“No friends?”

“Other than my mother? Not really, no.”

Still leaning on the tree trunk, Zach shoved his other hand in his pocket, his gaze tangling up with hers so hard she lost her breath. “So tell me about Landon. If you want to, I mean.”

At least, that’s what Mallory thought he’d said. Hard to tell through the buzzing between her ears. Jeebus. In a few short sentences, this stranger had offered more of himself, been more accepting of her, than Russell had over their entire relationship. She’d had no idea they even made men like that.

And hellz, yeah, you better believe she was going to take advantage of it.

“Leaving him behind was the hardest thing I’ve ever done,” she said over the lump in her throat. “But all the attention was really beginning to take its toll on the kid. Especially as he got older. The paparazzi never left us alone. Never. It was ridiculous—I have no idea what they thought they would see, what I’d do that would’ve been even remotely interesting, let alone fascinating. But wherever we went, there they were. No matter how much I tried to evade them.”

“That sucks.”

“You’re telling me. Even if Landon didn’t say anything, I could tell how hard it was on him.” A huge sigh pushed from her lungs. “What I said before, about only wanting him to feel normal? That’s all I’d ever wanted for him, even before all this. So his dad and I decided it would be best for him if I removed myself for a while.”

“Did you consider taking him with you instead?” he asked gently.

“Of course. But the kid’s life is there. Friends, activities...” She smiled. “His dad. Who can’t leave the scene. Or doesn’t think he can. And directors aren’t sexy from a gossip perspective. Seriously, how often do you see Steven Spielberg or Ron Howard’s picture on the front page of The National Enquirer? I was much more intriguing, in a let’s-all-pity-the-gimp kind of way. And I’m allowed to say that, being the gimp and all.”

“And your boy’s happier?”

“I think—hope—he’s at least more...at peace. And honestly? I’m still questioning whether I made the right choice. But it was the only one I felt I could. I’d do anything for that kid. Anything. I’m sure you know what that’s like.”

His lips barely curved. “All too well.”