Josephine Cox 3-Book Collection 1: Midnight, Blood Brothers, Songbird

‘Molly, I’m going to ask you something, and I want you to think very hard before you answer.’

Her curiosity was heightened. ‘Go on, then.’

‘You’ve been with me for over a year now. You know more about my dreams than anyone else. So, was there ever a time when you heard me call out for my mother?’

Molly shook her head. ‘I don’t think I’ve ever heard you cry out for anyone – certainly not your mother. So, is that what you did? How strange. What did he make of that?’

‘He said it was significant, that we’d made some kind of breakthrough,’ Jack explained. ‘Now, it’s changed everything. I’m finding it even harder to cope with. It was the way I called out for her, like a small child.’ He mimicked the cry that Mr Howard had portrayed. ‘He said it was the voice of a child, not much older than two or three years of age.’

‘But, what were his conclusions about the nightmares?’ Molly digressed. ‘Did he know why they were happening – and does he think he can help you?’

Jack remembered the psychiatrist’s cautious approach. ‘He said he couldn’t be certain what the cause was at this stage, but that we needed more sessions before we could root out the truth. He said we would have to be patient.’ Something made him hesitate from divulging too much of what Mr Howard had said. ‘He warned that different possibilities will come up – some right, some wrong – and that we have to deal with them as they occur. He said it would take time.’

‘And that’s it?!’ Molly was not satisfied. ‘So far, then, he has no real answers?’

‘Like I said, it’s bound to take time.’

From the tone of his voice and the way he was hesitating, Molly knew there was more. ‘You’re not telling me everything, are you?’ she accused.

Jack paused. He was reluctant to reveal how his dreams could be rooted in reality.

‘So, are you still planning on moving up north?’

‘With you, yes, I hope so.’

‘I’ve already said – if you go, you go on your own. Why should I leave everything behind – my job at Banbury’s, my family and my house – which in case you’ve forgotten, my brother is renting at the moment? I expect you want me to sell that too, don’t you?’

‘That would be entirely up to you.’ He had never interfered in Molly’s private arrangements. ‘I’ll probably sell this house and buy a home for us up in Lancashire. It makes sense.’

Molly didn’t agree. ‘Look at it from my point of view, Jack! It all seems a bit rushed, don’t you think? This morning there was no mention of any of this, and now suddenly you’re in a tearing hurry to up sticks and turn our lives upside down. What’s happened, Jack? Why is it so urgent that you move away?’ She grew increasingly impatient, ‘You are holding something back, I know it!’

Jack held his silence, unsure whether to confide in her. He didn’t know if it would change her mind about moving away, or if it would make her dig her heels in even more.

Reluctantly, Jack told her how the psychiatrist had suggested that his dreams might not be the product of a fertile imagination, but could be based on a traumatic event that took place in his early childhood. Even as he said it, Jack felt a shiver run down his back.

‘Oh, I see.’ Molly was ready for an argument. ‘That’s why you want to go back up there – to delve into the past and torment yourself even more.’ She could see how determined he was. ‘You’re not thinking straight, Jack.’ When she flounced off to the kitchen to put the kettle on, he followed her.

‘Oh, but I am! And I’ve got you to thank for that. You did right in making me see someone, because now I know what I must do.’ Putting his hands on her shoulders, Jack turned Molly to face him. ‘For the first time, I have something to go on. I need answers, and now I’m hopeful that maybe – just maybe – I’ll find out the truth.’

On the way home from work, Jack had thought long and hard about the series of events that had led him to these crossroads. Sharing his deeper thoughts with her, he said, ‘Don’t you think it’s strange, of all the places in the country where we could be opening a new showroom, the company chose to build it in Lytham St Anne’s, just a thirty-minute drive from the street where I grew up?’

Molly did not believe in fate; she preferred to think there was a rational explanation for everything. ‘There’s nothing “strange” about it, Jack.’ She gave a mocking little laugh. ‘It’s quite simple. The company chose to build the new showrooms in Lytham because they did their homework and decided a car-showroom was needed there. It’s business, Jack – plain and straight. It’s not some kind of celestial plan that’s meant to get you promoted and send you back to where you were born so you can find out if your nightmares are real.’

Jack was not altogether surprised by her cynicism. ‘So, why have you been asked to run the new showrooms, when there are any number of other people at Curtis Warren’s who are more than able to handle the responsibility?’

Agitated, Molly began pacing the floor. ‘It’s all academic anyway, because you’re not accepting the post. Or if you do, I won’t be going with you.’

‘You can’t mean that, Molly?’

‘Yes, Jack, I can, and do! And I want an answer right now.’ She swung round to face him. ‘Have you already signed the contract?’

‘Not yet, no. I’ll be handing it in tomorrow, signed and sealed, subject to Curtis Warren’s approval.’

‘Without even asking me?’

‘I’m asking you now, Molly. I want you with me.’

‘I take it this means you won’t be attending the clinic again?’

‘There’s no need. I know now what I have to do.’

‘Will anything I say make you change your mind?’

‘Please, Molly.’ Jack put his two arms about her. ‘Don’t do this.’ Drawing her close, he spoke softly. ‘We belong together, you and me. I don’t want to be without you. I want us to be married – to have children one day.’ He gave a nervous chuckle. ‘I want us to grow old together – you with your silver hair and me with my white beard and walking-stick. When we meander down the street, people will say, “Look! That’s the old couple with all them grandchildren.”’

Molly couldn’t help but laugh. ‘You’re crazy, you are.’

‘You’re right. I am – crazy for you.’

‘Then tell them you don’t want the job. Stay here, Jack. Attend the clinic. There’s no need to go chasing the past. Eventually it will all come right, you’ll see.’

Frustrated, Jack held her at arm’s length, ‘Do you love me, Molly?’

‘You know I do.’

‘Then why can’t you help me do this?’

‘Because it’s wrong!’ Angry at his dogged determination, she broke away from him. ‘We’re happy here, aren’t we?’

‘Well, yes, but we can be happy elsewhere just as well.’

Ignoring his comment, she pointed out, ‘Look, we have each other and we have our work. We’ve built a good life here together, and we’ve got plans. Why spoil it all now? Especially when you’ve finally found someone who can help you.’

Torn two ways, Jack paced back and forth across the kitchen, hands in his trouser pockets, and a look of desperation about him. Everything seemed to be falling apart between them, and he had to believe it was his fault.

‘Won’t you at least try to see it from my point of view, Molly?’ he asked. ‘You of all people know what it’s like with me. These nightmares are ruining my life – spoiling what we have! I need to clear my head, and I can’t do that unless I go back – to where it all began.’

He turned his back to her, his mind racing. ‘If I don’t try to find answers, Molly, I’ll never rest. I’ll never know! This is my chance and, more than anything, I want you there with me.’

The sound of footsteps made him swing round, only to find that Molly had gone.

‘Molly?’

Calling her name, he ran up the stairs two at a time, to find her in the bedroom, packing her suitcase. ‘Don’t do this!’ Jack was devastated. ‘Stay tonight at least. We can talk it through.’

Molly turned to him, her voice calm and cold. ‘If I do stay, will you change your mind about leaving here?’

For one desperate moment, Jack would have promised her the world if need be, just to keep her there. In his deepest heart though, he could not lie to her.