‘‘I’m not talking about touching.’’ Although he’d probably give up the deed to his home if he could put his hands on that yielding, tender flesh again. ‘‘I’m talking about the come-hither looks.’’ The light finally changed and he started through the intersection. The church was only two blocks away.
‘‘The…’’ Her voice trailed off into silence. ‘‘What on earth is the matter with you? I wouldn’t know how to give a ‘come-hither look’ if my life depended on it.’’
He was already regretting his words, aware that he wasn’t exactly acting rationally, but the steady increase in arousal he was experiencing, a longing that only grew sharper as the tension grew between them, prevented him from admitting it. Staring through the front windshield, he concentrated on his driving.
Beside him, Kristin made a small motion of frustration that he caught in his peripheral vision. ‘‘You,’’ she said in a controlled, precise tone, ‘‘are a jerk.’’
And those were the last words spoken. He parked at the church and she was out of the car and stalking across the parking lot before he could come around to get her door. He took long strides to catch up with her although she completely ignored him, signing her name in the register and slipping into a seat near the back of the quiet room. He took the seat beside her, and she made a production out of moving over so that her body didn’t brush his.
Hell. What was he going to do about Kristin? Nothing. She’s too young for you. But ever since she’d mentioned marriage and he’d begun to think of her as a woman rather than the girl he’d felt responsible for for the past eight years, he hadn’t been able to ignore her lithe figure.
The funeral service began then, and he tuned in with relief, shoving aside his troubled thoughts. Most of the board members of the animal sanctuary were there, as were employees and a lot of other local people who had come to know Cathie through her skillful fund-raising efforts. He’d closed his clinic, and Faye was there as well, along with several other members of the staff.
Beside him, he was aware that Kristin was crying quietly as the minister delivered a touching eulogy. Fishing in his pocket, he offered her his handkerchief, but she studiously ignored him and pulled a tissue from her own pocket. He wanted badly to put his arm around her and offer her comfort—but he suspected that after the way he’d behaved, she’d chew off his arm at the shoulder. Instead, all he could do was watch her from the corner of his eye. He could practically feel the control she exerted to quiet herself.
By the time the service ended, she was calm again. They made the short ride to the cemetery in utter silence and joined the other mourners for the brief graveside service. Afterward, Kristin stepped forward to speak briefly to Cathie’s parents. He did the same, but then got caught by one of the animal sanctuary’s board members who asked him in a quiet undertone if he had any suggestions for a replacement for Cathie. He shook his head and hurried to catch up with Kris.
As he came up behind her near the car, he realized she was crying again. She wept silently, her slender shoulders shaking and he stood there awkwardly, wondering what to do. He clenched his fists to prevent himself from reaching out and touching her. But after a moment, he couldn’t take the quiet sobbing anymore and he raised his arms and slipped them around her, pulling her close.
She burrowed against him instantly like a small creature seeking shelter from harm, her arms tightening around his waist. But almost as instantly she stiffened in his arms. ‘‘I’m not teasing you.’’ Her voice was muffled in his chest.
A wave of tenderness surged through him and he stroked a hand down her back. ‘‘I know. I’m sorry for that…earlier. I was just in a filthy mood.’’
She didn’t reply, but her body relaxed against his, and she let him hold her.
It was a mistake again, touching her, but at least this time he was prepared for the rush of awareness that tightened his gut and made his whole body feel hot and tingly. He bent his head and brushed his lips over the crown of her head. ‘‘I’m sorry. I know you really liked Cathie.’’
She nodded. ‘‘I did.’’ He could feel her warm breath through his summer-weight shirt and an involuntary shiver chased down his spine. ‘‘Daddy chose her, you know.’’
He nodded, understanding her grief. ‘‘I know. Brings it all back, doesn’t it?’’
She nodded.
Over her head, he saw Faye walking along the edge of the narrow road that wound through the cemetery. As she picked her way around his car, her gaze met his, and she gave him a smug, knowing smile.
He stifled a ridiculous urge to stick his tongue out at her and helped Kristin into the car. As he drove her home again, he clung to denial: a marriage between them was a ludicrous thought. She was young, fresh. He was a widower with a child. Their personalities didn’t mesh in any way as his had with Deb’s. They’d fight. It would never work.
The next day was her Saturday to volunteer at the animal sanctuary. She dressed in baggy khaki shorts and a comfortably oversize T-shirt, grabbed a toaster pastry and reached for her car keys. The whole time she was getting ready, she was worrying at the problem of finding a new executive director, mentally writing an ad to place.
But when she opened her door, Faye Proctor stood on the other side. Kristin nearly barreled into her, jolting to a halt with a gasp of surprise.
Faye put a hand to her throat and chuckled. ‘‘Lordy, you startled me!’’
‘‘You startled me, too.’’ She opened the door and gestured for Faye to enter. ‘‘Come on in. I have to help at Appalachian today but I have a few minutes. What’s up?’’
Faye sank onto the couch in Kristin’s small living room and Kristin took a seat opposite her. When their eyes met, Faye’s usually cheerful gaze was surprisingly sober. ‘‘Derek told me about your suggestion last week.’’
Great. If a person could vanish in a puff of smoke, Kristin fervently wished it would happen right now. This very moment. She squeezed her eyes tightly shut, feeling heat creep into her face, but when she opened them, Faye was still there, gazing patiently at her.
‘‘Oh,’’ said Kristin weakly. ‘‘That…rat.’’
Faye laughed. ‘‘I betcha ‘rat’ isn’t the word you really want to use!’’
‘‘Well, no,’’ she said, smiling a little, ‘‘it’s not.’’
‘‘I don’t mean to pry,’’ Faye assured her. ‘‘The thing is, I agree with you, honey.’’
Kristin stared at the older woman, speechless. She did?
‘‘Dr. Mahoney’s a great boss,’’ Faye said, ‘‘and I love working for him. But it’s been hard to watch him shut himself away from everything but that little girl since dear Debbie died. You’re all that’s kept him from folding his tents completely—’’
‘‘I don’t know about that,’’ Kristin interrupted.
‘‘I do,’’ Faye said. ‘‘You make him eat and go to work. You help with his housework and do his laundry. You’ve raised Miss Mollie, don’t think you haven’t.’’
‘‘That may be true, but as Derek pointed out to me, those aren’t reasons to get married.’’ She shrugged, trying to stave off the hurt the memory produced. They’d patched up their disagreement, if that was what that odd, charged exchange in which he’d accused her of teasing him had been, but there had been an uncomfortable strain between them that had lingered until she’d thanked him for the ride and slid out of his car.
Faye snorted. ‘‘That man can’t see his nose on his own darn face. Don’t you pay him any mind.’’
Kristin tilted her head. ‘‘What do you mean?’’
‘‘Any fool can see you care about Dr. Mahoney,’’ said Faye.
‘‘Is it that obvious?’’ She was dismayed.
‘‘No, no,’’ said Faye hastily. ‘‘But I’ve known you since you were a little girl and I’ve never seen you look at a man the way you look at Derek when he isn’t looking back.’’
Kristin felt herself flushing. ‘‘So?’’ She didn’t mean to be rude. She’d known Faye long enough to know the older woman wouldn’t take offense.
‘‘So you’ve never listened to him before,’’ Faye said, grinning. ‘‘You aren’t going to start now, are you?’’
Well. She had a point. But still… ‘‘Yes.’’ She made her voice firm. ‘‘I’m not going to live the rest of my life wishing for something I can’t have. If Derek doesn’t want me, I’m going to open myself to other possibilities.’’
‘‘You mean other men?’’ Faye’s eyes were wide.
Kristin nodded.
‘‘Don’t be hasty, honey. You dragged him back from the edge of climbing into that grave with Deb,’’ Faye reminded her. ‘‘He didn’t know what was good for him, and he still doesn’t.’’
‘‘But…’’ She was at a loss as to how to handle this strange conversation. ‘‘How am I supposed to…what can I do when he says—’’
‘‘Feminine wiles.’’ Faye smiled meaningfully. She tapped a brown shopping bag she’d brought in and set on the floor beside her. ‘‘I’ve got a few things in here that my daughter Carlie can’t wear since she had the baby. We’re going to make you look more like a woman.’’
‘‘More like a woman?’’ She fingered the mass of shining curls that fell over her shoulder. ‘‘I don’t think I exactly resemble a guy.’’
‘‘No,’’ Faye agreed. ‘‘You sure don’t. We’re just going to remind Dr. Mahoney a little bit.’’
‘‘How?’’ Kristin asked suspiciously. ‘‘I don’t want to have to wear a bunch of makeup—’’