Sheltered in His Arms

Mariah’s fingers dug into Sam’s neck; he rubbed her back reassuringly.

“You never had children?” He just couldn’t take it in. Didn’t want to. Didn’t want to believe he’d had anything to do with her decision. It was one of the reasons he’d left town and never come back. So that Cassie could get on with her life.

Or that was what he’d always told himself. He’d assumed, without question, that she’d meet someone, marry, have kids. He thought briefly of his syndicated comic strip—another secret. The origins of the Borough Bantam were unknown to the people of Shelter Valley and yet it was based on them. Cassie was the gazelle. And in one of last month’s episodes, the gazelle had given birth to twins.

“I don’t have any children,” she said, then stood as though dismissing him. “I’m happy your parents finally have you back, Sam,” she said, then added, “You always were the light of their life.”

Another too-familiar stab of guilt hit its mark. Sam also stood, sliding Mariah down to the floor beside him. The child’s eyes were pleading when he looked down at her. She was ready to go. Now.

Odd. He hadn’t realized that he was learning to communicate with her, to understand her, even without words. The thought brought a strange sort of comfort.

“I guess I’ll be seeing you around,” he said, guiding Mariah back into the hallway. He needed to tell Cassie about Mariah. And he would, as soon as he had a chance to talk to her alone. He needed to tell her the child wasn’t his. Or not biologically, in any case.

Cassie had never married. God, he felt sick. And ashamed. A bone-deep shame.

“Okay” was all she said. So why did he hear, Not if I can help it?

After ten years, she still hated him so much. He deserved it; he knew that. Why had he been foolish enough to hope that the years might have dulled the consequences of his sins?

Mariah walked stoically beside him down the hall, which seemed to have grown a mile longer during his stay in Cassie’s office, and he realized that if he was going to get through this, he had to concentrate solely on his new daughter—her needs, not his own. Just as they reached the door that would lead them back to the waiting room, she turned, looking over her shoulder.

“Cassie’s a nice lady, don’t you think?” he asked gently, his heart rate speeding up.

Mariah didn’t answer him, but for the first time since her parents were killed, she’d shown an interest in something. It might not be much, but it was a start.

At that moment, Sam was willing to settle for anything.

“Let’s go see if Grandma has lunch ready, okay?” he asked, squeezing Mariah’s hand.

He might as well have been talking to himself.

CASSIE DIDN’T SEE Sam again for two days. She was walking home from the clinic on Wednesday evening—since she’d left her car at home that morning—enjoying the balmy Arizona spring day, trying to work up some enthusiasm for the cabbage rolls she’d made over the weekend and was going to have for dinner.

She’d had a good day. Had helped a collie through a difficult birth, managing to save all six puppies and the mother, as well. They’d been so adorable, she hadn’t been able to resist when the collie’s owner had offered Cassie pick of the litter. Now that she wasn’t going to be traveling so much, she’d been planning to get a dog. And she’d always loved collies.

“Can we give you a ride home?”

Still reacting to that familiar voice, even after all these years, Cassie didn’t stop walking. “No, thanks,” she called, barely glancing Sam’s way.

He drove a white truck.

She’d have expected him to drive a Lincoln Continental, or some other expensive car. But the truck seemed to suit him. Not that she really knew anything about Sam, or what would suit him. Nor did she want to.

Back to cabbage rolls. Yes, they’d be good. She’d treat herself to two. That would leave two more meals’ worth in the freezer. It was a good thing they’d only take a few minutes to microwave. She was getting hungry and—

“I have a cousin.”

Sam came up behind her, on foot, Mariah’s bony little legs moving quickly beside him. Glancing back, Cassie saw his truck parked at the curb.

What did he want with her, for God’s sake?

“I know you do,” she said aloud. She realized that the news had to be a shock. When he’d left, he was the sole Montford descendant, the family’s one hope. Now he’d come home to discover that an unknown cousin had shown up.

“You’ve met him?”

“Yes.”

Mariah’s hair was braided today. Cassie could just picture Carol fussing over the little girl. Her ex-mother-in-law must be about the happiest woman in Shelter Valley these days.

Cassie was genuinely thrilled for Carol. She’d always loved the woman like a second mother.

Her own mother didn’t even know Sam was in town. Her parents had left at the end of March for the six-month cruise around the world that they’d been saving half their lives to take. Cassie was glad they were gone. She had no idea how they’d react to Sam’s reappearance. Her father, who’d had four daughters and no sons, had taken Sam’s defection personally.

He’d also been the one who had to tell Cassie that her baby girl had died.

“What’s he like?” Sam asked, slowing his pace now that he was even with her. Mariah walked between them, staring ahead, it seemed, at nothing. “Ben, I mean. My cousin.”

Watching the child, Cassie frowned. “He’s very nice,” she said, wondering what was wrong with Sam’s daughter. Wondering how to ask. “He came to town last fall, fell in love with his English teacher—who wasn’t really a teacher at all, it turned out.” She gave a quick shrug. “It’s a long story. They’re married now.”

“Mom said he’s got a daughter Mariah’s age.”

Cassie nodded, wishing her house wasn’t still two streets away. She couldn’t do this. Walk casually with Sam and the child who’d never be hers, pretending they could be friends. “She’s not actually his, biologically. Did your mom tell you that?”

“Yeah.” Sam nodded, his free hand in the pocket of his jean-shorts. His long legs were more muscled than she remembered. “She said he married a girl his senior year in high school who claimed he was the father of her child.”

“She let him support her for almost eight years before she told him Alex belonged to her boyfriend, who was in prison.”

“Mom said that Ben’s being awarded full and permanent custody of her, though.”

“Her real father beat—” Glancing down at the head bobbing between them, Cassie broke off. “He wasn’t a very good father.”

“I gather Ben is.”

“Obviously you haven’t met him yet,” Cassie said, “or you’d know he was.”

Sam nodded again. “You’re right, I haven’t met him, but Mom’s pushing for a get-together.”

“Ben’s a great guy. Looks a bit like you.” In fact he resembled Sam enough that Cassie had had a hard time liking the man when she’d first met him. But he was Zack’s closest friend. Nowadays Cassie not only liked and respected him, she admired the hell out of him. Ben Sanders was a real man in the true sense of the word.

Too bad Sam didn’t share those particular genes…. Cassie stopped her reaction even as it took shape. She wasn’t going to do this. She wasn’t going to grow old and hard with bitterness, entertaining nasty thoughts. She was okay now. Happy with her life. Surrounded by friends and family who loved her.

“Just seems odd, after a lifetime of being the only Montford heir, to find out that I’m not.”

“It’s not like your inheritance meant a whole lot to you the past ten years.” Damn her tongue. She turned the corner, Sam and Mariah staying in step beside her.

“It doesn’t mean squat to me.”

He’d certainly said so with great frequency. But until he’d left, turning his back on the money, the position, the town, she’d never really thought he believed it. She’d always thought the complaints were just a habit left over from when he was a kid, railing against expectations.