Christmas with Dr Delicious

Fraser moved forward, his arms lifting in her direction. To hug her?

Yikes. No way. Not now, not here. Not ever. Quickly shoving her right hand out, she gripped his, shook it perfunctorily and let go. But not before something she hadn’t felt for five years zinged up her arm. Desire.

Fraser heard Nikki mutter, ‘Dang.’ She spun away, her thick dark blonde plait swinging across her back as she added, ‘I need coffee.’

Fraser grimaced. He could relate to that. Strong, black coffee might just fix what ailed him. Temporarily.

As if the mess he’d created way back when he’d learned he wasn’t invulnerable could ever be fixed. Even with the best reasons in the world there was no denying he’d mucked up big time. Especially with this woman standing within reaching distance and looking as remote as the top of the Himalayas.

He couldn’t prevent himself watching every movement Nikki made as she crossed to the whiteboard where case studies were written up for everyone to read and learn from. Despite the bulky green jacket she wore she seemed leaner than he remembered. Her steps were more deliberate, as though she’d lost the constant spring in her walk. Nikki Page. The girl he’d cherished at school. The woman he’d desperately wanted to marry. The lady he’d walked away from. Walked? Sped from, more like. He’d broken her heart. He’d also broken his own. Completely.

But he’d eventually got over her. Or so he’d thought. He’d truly believed that or he’d never have come to work here, despite how much he needed to become an AP for his father’s sake.

‘How do you take your coffee, Fraser?’ Mike waved a mug at him, thankfully shifting his focus for a second.

‘Black, thanks.’ His gaze instantly returned to Nikki. Hell, a few moments ago he’d nearly hugged her. Why? Trying to prove that seeing her again was easy, that he had no hang-ups from the past? Proving it to Nikki? Or himself? Suddenly he felt unsure of everything—his plans to remain in Blenheim and settle down, his yearning to claw back the friendships he’d known before he’d messed up.

‘I’ve got some cereal here for our breakfast,’ the girl introduced to him as Amber told Nikki. Then waved the box at him. ‘Fraser?’

Nikki’s shoulders rolled. ‘Not hungry at the moment.’

‘Me neither.’ He’d forced some toast down before leaving home twenty minutes ago, nearly gagging as it had stuck in his throat. Tiredness dragged at his body after he’d spent half the night pacing the house, keeping away from his parents’ room in case he woke his light-sleeping mother. He’d asked himself repeatedly if coming to work here was the right thing to do, and had repeatedly come up with the same answer. It wasn’t, and yet it was if he was getting on with his new life.

Amber shook the cereal box. ‘You’ve got to have some food, Nikki. You’ve hardly eaten anything for days now.’

Nikki winced. ‘Okay, just a little to appease you, bossy.’

So Nikki’s appetite had disappeared lately. Since she’d heard he was coming to work at the same station? Strange, but he couldn’t possibly affect her any more, could he? Not after the damage he’d done before. The way he’d treated her had been truly bad, despite his justifiable reasons.

‘I’m bossy?’ Amber chuckled. ‘That’s rich.’

‘That’s what friends are for. Keeping you in line.’ Nikki shrugged eloquently and rubbed out a word on the board, rewrote it spelled correctly. ‘Gavin, your spelling is atrocious. And don’t go blaming your Welsh background. We might speak funny in New Zealand but the words are the same.’

Gavin looked up from the paper and spoke in what sounded like a put-on broad Welsh accent. ‘You’re right, Amber. She’s nothing if not officious.’ His wink showed how unfazed he was by Nikki’s comments. ‘So, Fraser, what brings you back to Blenheim? If you don’t mind me asking, that is?’

‘Family.’ And getting on with the life he’d believed for so long he’d never get the chance to live. A second chance. ‘My dad’s not well so I want to be around to help out with things like keeping the house and section in order, making sure my mother’s coping okay.’

Nikki’s hand stilled on the board. Listening carefully? She asked without turning around, ‘What’s wrong with Ken?’

‘He’s got dementia.’

Nikki gasped, turned to look at him, sympathy in those wide azure eyes. ‘That’s terrible. Hard for your mum too, I imagine. I’m sorry, I didn’t know.’

None of Nikki’s family had had anything to do with his parents since that dreadful day when he’d hurt not just Nikki but two families who’d cared about him. He’d lost a lot of people who’d been important to him that day, but he only had himself to blame.

‘Mum’s managing but I think she’s reaching her limits now that Dad’s getting very argumentative and wanders a bit. That’s why I’ve decided to live at home and not get my own place yet.’

Nikki nodded. ‘I can hear your mum now, checking what time you get home at night, making sure you put your washing out. She’ll be enjoying having you to watch over.’

There was a lot Nikki didn’t know but she’d got that spot on. His mum had been devastated that he hadn’t come home when he’d been diagnosed, but she certainly seemed intent on making up for that now.

Gavin leaned back in his chair. ‘You can’t beat having your family around. They take precedence over everything else.’

There’s no wedding ring on Nikki’s finger. The thought blazed through him. She’s still single. Hang on. No ring meant nothing. She could be in a relationship. Why not? A stunning-looking woman whom everyone adored would attract any red-blooded male. He should feel happy for her, not empty and sad. And maybe a tiny bit hopeful.

‘Are your parents still living in Redwood Street?’ Nikki stared at him. ‘Fraser?’

He shook away those bewildering thoughts. ‘Same old house that I grew up in. It’s looking a bit tired now.’ His mum was struggling with the maintenance. He should’ve come home sooner but no one had told him he was needed. Not until the night last month when he’d phoned his parents to give them the good news that his five-year tests had shown no sign of the cancer returning. The specialist had virtually given him an all-clear and a new lease on life.

His good news had been tempered with the information that his father had dementia and had had it for two years. It hurt that his mother had decided not to mention it while the cancer cloud had hung over him. Another black mark against him.

There’d been no time yesterday to track Nikki down and make contact prior to starting here. Neither had he found out anything about her, so he asked now, ‘Are you living on the farm? Or in town somewhere?’

‘Amber and I share a poky flat not far from here.’

No address, then. But what had he expected? An invitation to dinner? ‘Most of town isn’t far from here.’

Mike coughed. ‘Can I see you two in my office? Now?’

Nikki’s azure eyes blinked. ‘Shouldn’t Gavin be joining you? He’s the one going to work with Fraser.’

Mike answered brusquely, ‘No. Bring your coffee with you.’

At the table Gavin appeared totally absorbed in the newspaper.

What was up? Suddenly Fraser sensed he was about to learn something he definitely would not like. He knew that feeling. It started deep in his belly and writhed outwards, upwards, cold and insidious, taking over his body and then his mind. He’d known it once before and that time the news had been grim. He wanted to call out to Mike, to stop him before any words were uttered, but Mike had disappeared into his office.

At the door Nikki turned back to him, a huge question in her eyes. So she was worried too. He wished he had it in his power to take away that dread blinking back at him. Hell, she was still gut-wrenchingly beautiful. His heart slowed, his throat filled as he headed in the direction of the office they’d been summoned to. She still turned his head, still made him want to hold her and run his hands over her satin skin. Talk about bad timing for remembering those particular sensations. Nikki Page was a no-go zone.

Closing the office door was a mistake. He’d shut the three of them into the small space and there was no getting away from Nikki. He drew a deep, steadying breath. And inhaled her scent. The one that had always reminded him of summer gardens; of roses and freesias and peonies. For a brief moment his head spun, almost taking his feet out from under him. Placing a hand on top of the filing cabinet, he waited for his heart rate to slow to normal. And tried to concentrate on the dull, grey carpet under his black workboots.

Then Mike began to speak and he forgot everything as the dread he’d felt minutes ago became reality.

‘Gavin handed me his notice last night. Patricia has been homesick for a while now so they’re heading back to Wales next month.’ Mike sat on the edge of his desk, his feet stretched between them. ‘Nikki, you’re taking his place as Fraser’s mentor.’

‘C-can’t Gavin do it until he leaves? A month’s a long time.’ Her bottom teeth bit into her top lip and her wide eyes gleamed desperately at her boss. ‘I can take over in September.’

‘No, Fraser deserves continuity while he’s training.’ Mike hesitated, looked from Nikki to him and back to Nikki. ‘Look, you two have obviously got history but if you’re working here then you leave it at the door. Our patients deserve one hundred per cent concentration from all of us, all the time. I can’t have you warring on the job.’

‘That won’t happen,’ Fraser rushed to assure him.

Nikki’s head snapped up and the glare that pierced him told him he shouldn’t be so sure of that. But she did say, ‘As long as we keep everything on a professional basis, it should work.’ A breath escaped between her lips. ‘I guess,’ she added softly, the glare softening as worry and uncertainty took over.

Mike continued to outline what was expected of them both, then handed Fraser a folder, a key and a pager. ‘Your rosters, course notes and timetable, and access codes.’ He then shoved out his hand and clasped Fraser’s. ‘Again, welcome aboard. It’s great to have someone experienced joining us. Isn’t it, Nikki?’

Shaking Mike’s hand, Fraser watched Nikki as she hauled herself off the chair. ‘Yes, a change from training someone right from scratch.’ Her voice was a monotone, as though she’d put a tight rein on herself. Was she barely keeping from yelling at him to go away, get lost?

Ah, Nik, if only you knew how much I regret having done that to you once already. On everyone’s belts pagers beeped simultaneously. Relief poured across Nikki’s face as she snatched at hers. ‘Priority one. We’re on, Fraser.’ And she was gone, charging out the door and into the garage before he’d taken a step.