First Time in Forever

“Whatever her old life was like, it’s gone. She needs to rebuild a life. And it needs to be a normal life. She doesn’t need staff, she needs security.”

“That’s why I’ve already decided that from now on I’m only leaving the cottage when we need food.”

“I don’t mean that sort of security. I mean the sort that comes from knowing there are people around you who care about you and have your back. You can’t keep her hidden in the cottage, Emily. Both of you will go crazy. She’s a kid. She needs to explore and play. She needs to meet other kids. And what about you? Are you going to spend the next twelve years shut away here with no adult company?”

“I’m planning the next twelve hours. I can’t think further ahead than that.” Twelve years? The thought made her want to hyperventilate. “I’m going to need to make trips into town. She’s too young to be left alone and I don’t have anyone here I can trust.”

“Hey, let’s take this a step at a time.” He sat down in the chair opposite her. “This is why Brittany said you were panicking.”

There was much more to her panic and feelings of inadequacy than her ability to keep Lizzy’s identity a secret. Eventually, she knew, media attention would move to other things, other lives, but she’d still be the child’s guardian, and she knew she wasn’t equipped for that monumental task. “When I told her what happened, she suggested I use the cottage. Kathleen left it to Brittany because she wanted her to have somewhere that was hers, somewhere she could go when life was tough. On our last day together at college Brittany gave us both a key.”

“You and Skylar?”

“Yes. She said Kathleen would have wanted it. We were moving to different sides of the country. In Brittany’s case, to a different continent half the time. It was somewhere we could come if we ever needed it.”

“And you needed it.”

“It seemed like a perfect place to hide while I worked out what to do.”

For Lizzy it was perfect. For her, it was a nightmare. The crash of the waves kept her awake, churning up memories like the ocean churned sand on the seabed.

“What’s your connection to Lana Fox?”

Emily was filled with a ridiculous desire to lean on all that hard strength, an impulse that made no sense because she’d been taking care of herself since she was younger than Lizzy.

“She was my sister.” She saw his expression shift from concern to surprise. “I hadn’t seen Lana since I left to go to college, and I met her child for the first time three days ago. We have no relationship. Lizzy has lost her mother and everything familiar and all she has is me.” Panic bubbled up inside her. “That isn’t good.”

“Yeah, that must feel like a hell of a responsibility to shoulder alone. Is someone contesting the guardianship? Another relative?”

“There are no other relatives.”

“Do you know the identity of the father?”

“Lana never told anyone. I’m all she has.” Saying it aloud made it seem all the more terrifying.

“I didn’t know Lana Fox had a sister.”

“Half sister. We had the same mother. Different fathers.” Nameless, faceless men whom her mother had taken home after one of her nights of endless drinking.

“I saw mention of her mother once. She was an alcoholic—” His voice tailed off as he saw her expression change. “I apologize. She was your mother, too.”

“I’m not afraid of facts, and the facts were that my mother used to sleep with men when she was drunk and then face the consequences sober. She died a couple of years ago. Her liver decided it had been to one party too many.”

“I don’t remember Lana Fox ever talking about her family in the press.”

“She reinvented herself. We didn’t exactly have a fairy-tale childhood.”

“Some fairy tales are pretty bad.” He stretched out his legs. “That woman in Cinderella was a real bitch.” It lightened the atmosphere, and a laugh bubbled up from her throat. “Yes. And then there was the queen in Snow White. She was a classic case of narcissistic personality disorder.”

“Cruella de Vil was a serial killer.”

“—of Dalmatians.”

“True, but she demonstrated the same psychotic tendencies seen in other murderers. Lack of compassion and lack of remorse.”

“Maybe my childhood was closer to a fairy tale than I thought.”

“Too many elements missing. For a start, you didn’t find your prince.” He glanced at her left hand. “You’re single.”

“Whenever I saw him climbing up the tower to my bedroom I gave him a push.”

“Yeah? Just for my own interest and research, what was it that put you off?”

“He was creepy.”

“Right.” His smile faded. “So you and Lana weren’t close as children?”

“I was the ugly sister.”

“Given how manifestly wrong that description is, I assume it was hers.”

“It wasn’t wrong. She was very beautiful.” Emily thought about the reality of her childhood. “And, no, we weren’t close. We were just people living under the same roof for a little while. It was a shock when they called me to say she’d named me guardian, but then I thought about it and realized there wasn’t anyone else. It was a decision made out of necessity, not choice.”

“Did she leave you a letter?”

“Nothing.”

“So one minute you were living your life, a life in which you’d had no contact with your half sister since you were a teenager, and the next you were guardian to her child. That is a major life change. Were you working? What did you do with the math and economics you studied?”

“Up until last month I was a management consultant. I worked for Taylor Hammond in New York.”

He looked impressed. “That’s the big-time.”

“They had a reorganization and there was no job for me in the new structure. I was interviewing for new jobs when I found out about Lizzy.” She clenched her hands in her lap. “Skylar would make some observation about how that was an indication that this was meant to be. How one day I’ll look back and be pleased this happened.”

Ryan gave a low laugh. “Kirsti would probably say the same thing. She believes in fate. So, are you missing New York? You had a life there.”

Emily wondered if what she’d had could really be described as a life. “I had a job and a boyfriend.”

“So there was a prince. You pushed him down the tower with the others?”

“He jumped. He got a look at the princess, decided she didn’t look like a good deal and got the hell out.” It helped to make a joke of it. “He dumped me a month ago.”

“Not very princely behavior. And that was before Lizzy was on the scene. So it wasn’t because of the child?”

“No.” She stared at the mess on the floor. “Not because of that.”

“How long were you together?”