The passion in his tone almost scared her, and Allie bent her head. She said half to herself, ‘Oh, God, I shouldn’t have come here…’
‘Do not say so.’ His voice hardened. ‘Do not ever say that, mon coeur, because without you I would be only half alive.’
He reached out a hand, resting it on her bare leg, just above the knee, and she covered it with both her own, feeling the reassurance of its warmth as they drove in silence back to Les Sables.
When they reached the house, Remy switched off the engine, then turned to her, drawing her into his arms. He looked down at her for a long moment, before taking her mouth with his, kissing her with a thoroughness and frank expertise that left her dizzied and gasping for breath, her hands clutching the front of his shirt as if it was her last hold on sanity.
‘Remy…’ His name was a croak.
‘I need the taste of you, mon ange.’ His own breathing was ragged. ‘To carry with me through the day.’ He detached one of the clinging hands and carried it to his lips. ‘I will see you tonight? You will have dinner with me?’
She nodded almost numbly, then got out of the Jeep, shading her eyes from the morning sun as she watched him drive away.
Tante was sitting at the kitchen table, reading her letters, as Allie came into the house. Her calm gaze assimilated the dishevelled hair, the wild rose flush and the faintly swollen mouth, but she made no comment.
‘The coffee is fresh, dear child, if you would like some.’
‘I—I had breakfast at Trehel.’
The older woman nodded drily. ‘So Georges de Brizat told me on the telephone.’ She paused. ‘Your little web of untruth is spreading dangerously wide, ma mie. How long before it breaks, I ask myself?’
Allie sat down at the table, staring down at the oilcloth, tracing its pattern with a finger. She said in a low voice, ‘I know I have to tell him, Tante Madelon, and I will—soon. I promise. But…’
‘But you are so happy you cannot bear anything that might spoil your idyll.’ Tante studied her. ‘You do not trust Remy to understand?’
‘I—I’m learning to trust.’
‘Then learn quickly, ma chère.’ Tante got briskly to her feet and fetched the coffee from the stove. ‘Before he guesses you are hiding something—and begins to wonder if he can trust you.’
I should have listened to her, Allie thought wretchedly, sitting up and easing her back, stiff from sitting so long in one position on the sofa. I should have taken the risk and told Remy everything. But I was too scared of losing him. And in the end, because I was stupid and a coward, I lost him anyway…
The music had ended long ago, and she replaced the CD in its case and switched off the player.
The house was totally silent, the blackness of the night pressing against the windows, making her feel suddenly isolated—alienated.
She thought with a shiver, It’s very late. I should go to bed, instead of tormenting myself with the desperation of the past.
Because Remy won’t be listening to the silence, or staring into the darkness a few miles away at Trehel. He’s not torturing himself with bad memories. He’s put the past where it belongs and set his life back in order, the way it should always have been.
So, he’ll be asleep in that enormous bed, with Solange in his arms, her bright sunflower hair across his pillow and that little victorious smile on her lips.
Solange…
Jerkily, she brought her clenched fist to her mouth. Bit savagely at the knuckle as pain ravaged her.
Solange, she thought, wincing. The girl she’d seen as an irritant, perhaps, but never a danger. Someone she’d underestimated from Day One—that she’d even allowed herself to pity a little. But perhaps her happiness with Remy had made her blind—even arrogant.
She opened the back door and stood leaning against the frame, drawing in deep lungfuls of cool air as she fought for calm.
Because she had been happy in a way that was totally outside her experience, measuring her life only in the hours they spent together. Beginning with the dinner he’d promised her that evening…
‘Richaud has a son at last,’ he’d told her with amusement, as they’d sat eating lobster in a candlelit restaurant overlooking the sea. ‘Papa says he will be drunk for a week in celebration.’
Allie dealt carefully with a claw. ‘Is it really so important to men—this need for a male heir?’
He shrugged. ‘The inheritance laws are different here, but a son at least carries on the family name, and for Richaud it also means a strong arm to help him on his land.’ He looked at her, brows lifted. ‘You think that is a chauvinist point of view, ma belle?’
‘I suppose not,’ she said. ‘As long as it doesn’t become an obsession.’
‘Your father would have preferred a son?’ He smiled at her. ‘That I do not believe.’ He paused. ‘For myself, a healthy child born safely to the woman I love is all I would ever want.’ Now, whispered the voice in her head. Be honest with him. Tell him about Hugo—the nightmare of your marriage. Tell him everything—now—and ask for his understanding—his help…
But as she nerved herself the waiter appeared beside them, pouring more wine, whisking away the discarded pieces of shell, and the moment was lost.
And when they arrived back at Les Sables, Tante was waiting up, hiding her private concerns behind polite welcome, but clearly determined not to leave them alone together.
Remy’s goodnight kiss was frankly rueful. ‘Tomorrow,’ he whispered. ‘I am free in the afternoon. Will you come swimming with me?’
‘Yes.’ Allie’s eyes shone as she detached herself reluctantly from his arms. ‘Yes, of course.’
‘We have a pool at Trehel, but I think madame would feel that is too secluded.’ He paused. ‘So, to assure her of my good intentions, I shall take you to St Calot, where there will be many other people.’
She bit her lip. ‘Remy—she really likes you…’
His tone was wry. ‘Yet she still looks at me, mon ange, as if I were a wolf, threatening her only lamb.’ He sighed. ‘However, she is right to care about you. And I have only to persuade her that I care too.’ He kissed her again. ‘A demain.’
Except it’s not you, but me that she doesn’t trust, Allie thought with sudden bleakness as she turned back into the house. And I can’t blame her for that.
The weather continued to be glorious, with each sunlit tomorrow blending seamlessly into the next, and Remy making time to be with her on each of them, in spite of his workload.
But as the days passed Allie found the idea of sharing the truth with him was becoming ever more difficult. She felt totally detached from her previous life, as if Marchington Hall existed on some other planet, and the sole reality was here and now, with the man she loved and wanted so passionately.
‘I am going to Vannes tomorrow, to visit some old friends,’ Tante announced one evening. She added drily, ‘I take it that you will not wish to go with me?’
Allie flushed. ‘I’d rather stay here—if you don’t mind.’
‘Au contraire, chérie. I suspect you would not have an enlivening day with Emil and Annette. And I am also sure you will not be lonely.’ She paused. ‘I do not condone, but I understand, ma chère,’ she added quietly, ‘and I simply—bow to the inevitable.’
There was a silence, then Allie said huskily, ‘Tante, I—I didn’t mean to fall in love with him. And I can’t go on deceiving him. I know that.’ She lifted her chin. ‘Tomorrow. I’ll try and tell him then.’
‘After, one presumes, you have at last rewarded his admirable restraint?’ Madame’s tone of voice conveyed a hint of true Gallic cynicism. ‘You are wise, Alys. A well-satisfied man is likely to be more—indulgent.’
Allie’s face burned. ‘You make me sound so calculating.’
‘I think you should be,’ her great-aunt said frankly. ‘It is time, ma chère, that you began to consider, very carefully, your future, and what part in it, if any, is destined for your young doctor. Because,’ she added, ‘he will undoubtedly wish to know.’
The weather began to change not long after Tante’s departure the following morning. Clouds were massing in the west, and the wind had freshened sharply. When Allie, suddenly restless in the confines of Les Sables, went out for a walk, she could hear the roar of the waves, thrashing at the cliffs, and found she was struggling to keep her balance against some of the gusts.
By the time Remy arrived it had begun to rain, and Allie was outside struggling to deal with a recalcitrant shutter.