Sahm I Am

I tried to laugh it off, but Marianne saw me, and you know I can’t hide anything from her. She walked over and told me she had something for me in her car, and when we got there, I just bawled. Marianne is very sweet, but she already has her figure back and Helene is only 8 months old. And Brandon comes home every day from the biochemical lab he works for and spends time with her. And she went to college to get a home economics degree, just so she could become the most brilliant and content SAHM in the world (but humbler than Rosalyn). She spends all day quilting and scrapbooking. The only fly in her utopian ointment is Helene. Where that baby got such a temper, I have NO idea—Brandon and Marianne are both so soft-spoken. But, hey, nobody’s life should be absolutely perfect.

Anyway, I digress. Needless to say, Marianne was scant comfort to my tattered ego. So I skipped the meeting, came home and put the girls to bed, and ate some ice cream and watched a stupid reality show on TV. I thought about chatting with you, and went to put on my all-I-can-chat pajamas. But as I was washing my face, I looked in the mirror, and guess what I found?

MY FIRST GRAY HAIR!

Thus, the fetal position and no chat. How on earth did I get so old? Sunday night, I was still the energetic, perky 20-something mom of three toddlers. Monday night, I have one foot in the grave with impending heart disease and look as if I frequent all-you-can-eat buffets. Not to mention the lingering odor of bodily excretions wafting throughout the house. If that doesn’t say “nursing home” to you, I don’t know what does.

Waiting glumly for my social security check,

Dulcie

Reason #1: “A gray head is a crown of glory; it is found in the way of righteousness.” Proverbs 16:31 DON’T YOU DARE PULL THAT HAIR OUT, YOU HEAR ME? :) IT’S A BADGE OF HONOR.

Reason #2: Your pastor’s wife probably went home later and banged her head against a wall wondering how she could have said something so stupid. Come on, you know that’s what you or I would be doing. Pastor’s wife or not, she can’t be all THAT different from the rest of us.

I think you should tell the whole sahmiam group about it. For encouragement—we can read and think “Gee, what am I complaining about? Things could always be worse!” :) Just teasin’

Z

Dear Future-shapers,

Dulcie, what a horrible day! However, I suppose if you’re going to wear jogging pants and a T-shirt to church, you might be asking for problems. I always believe in looking my best, even if I’m home all day.

Jocelyn, so sorry to hear that Tyler’s team lost. That’s too bad. But at least it’s an opportunity to build good sportsmanship. That’s something I worry about with my kids—Suzannah and Jefferson haven’t ever had to experience the pain of losing, though they are involved in piano and Bible club competitions. Of course, they are only 6 and 5, but they already have quite a collection of ribbons and awards. And Abigail’s just 3, but I anticipate she will follow in their footsteps. We’ll have to figure out how to teach them good sportsmanship some other way, I guess.

That reminds me—I am very pleased to announce that my recipe for Fresh Figs with Warm Balsamic Glaze won grand champion in the open division of our county fair. It will be headed to the state fair later this month. I’ll be glad to share the recipe with all of you. The key is to use sucanat or organic sugar—none of that refined junk. Just e-mail me if you want the recipe.

Have a fabulous SAHM day!

Rosalyn

“She looks well to the ways of her household, and does not eat the bread of idleness.”

Proverbs 31:27 (NASB)

I’D LIKE TO TAKE THE BREAD OF IDLENESS AND SHOVE IT DOWN HER THROAT!

Dulcie

Now, Dulcie, I don’t think that’s exactly what Christ had in mind when He said, “Feed my sheep.”:) Give her grace, okay? She doesn’t mean to be…well, the way she is.

Peace,

Jocelyn

You’re right. I’ll drizzle it with “warm balsamic glaze” first. Using refined sugar, none of that organic junk.

Dulcie

Hi Darling,

I’ll be home around 6 this evening, and we’ll have the whole weekend together, OK? Sorry I wasn’t able to return your phone call on Monday. Sounds like it was a rough day. But by the time I got done with meetings and everything, I just went back to the hotel and crashed. This entire week has been wild. Glad it’s over.

I miss you, can’t wait to get home and see you and the girls.

All my love,

Tom

Virtuous Women,

This week I thought we could discuss the highlight of our children’s day—when Daddy comes home. What little things can we do each day to make this important event special, not only for our children, but also for our dearest hardworking husbands who sacrifice so much to provide for our families?

In our home, we spend from 4 to 5 every afternoon in preparation activities. These include the following:

1) I make sure my hair is done, and I put on makeup and change into fresher clothes.

2) My children make sure their clothes are clean, their hair is neat and their rooms are sparkling.

3) We tidy up the house.

4) Dinner is always nearly ready and the table set.

Then we have various extras we throw in on a rotating basis. Sometimes, we literally “roll out the red carpet”—a carpet runner laid on the sidewalk leading up to the front door—and give him a paper crown the children colored. Other times we simply have soothing music playing in the background while we rub his feet and shoulders. But my children’s favorite (and Chad’s) is the “Daddy’s Home” song. I wrote the lyrics a few years ago, and set them to the tune of “Oklahoma!”

HERE!

He comes, my daddy’s (or hubby’s) home from working hard all day,

And with kisses sweet,

And hugs we greet

Him at the door, just so that we can say…

How much we

LOVE!

To have him home with us the end of every day,

He’s a brave, strong man,

We’ll do all we can

To show our thanks to him in every way.

(Refrain)