Past Secrets, Present Love

In less than fifty words he’d conveyed the problem and formed a solution. That was Ross. Succinct didn’t begin to describe his use of language.

The wind was bitter, filled with piercing bits of ice that stung when they hit the skin. Kelly shivered again, wondered if she’d be doing something illegal if she left. But then Ross was a private detective. He’d know all about this stuff, wouldn’t he?

“I’ll drop you off, then come back and watch while Vinnie loads your car and tows it. Now will you get in?”

“Oh. Okay. Thanks. Just let me get my bag.” Kelly stepped daintily through the soggy mess underfoot, dragged out her black beaded bag and her car keys, then locked the door. By the time she made it into Ross’s car her feet felt like icicles.

He watched, one inquisitive eyebrow raised, as she slipped her toes out of the delicate shoes, burying them in the carpet.

“Very pretty, Ms. Young, but not exactly weather-appropriate footwear,” he mumbled, then quickly flicked the heater on high.

“They’re very appropriate. It’s a wedding, not a trapper’s festival,” she snapped, then wished she hadn’t. “Sorry,” she murmured when his eyebrows rose.

Kelly hated snarky people and had long ago decided not to become one of them. But something about Ross Van Zandt and his piercing scrutiny always made her tense. Maybe it was because he made a living probing into people’s secrets. More likely it was because he was the one Sandra Lange had hired to find her child. That would be reason enough, especially since it was Ross who only days ago had informed her and Ben Cavanaugh that one of them might be the long lost child Sandra had been looking for. He had no idea how wrong he was.

Of course, Kelly felt sorry for Sandra. As director of Tiny Blessings Adoption Agency, Kelly spent every day dealing with people who were giving up their children for adoption. It was often a difficult and heartrending event. Sandra must have suffered terribly when she was forced to give up her own child.

But Kelly did not want to be her daughter.

Of course she knew she’d been adopted, had known it for years. In fact, she’d been the first child whose adoption Tiny Blessings had handled back when Barnaby Harcourt had been in charge. But being adopted had never been an issue with Kelly. Marcus and Carol Young were the best parents a girl could have. Living with them, being part of their family—that’s all she’d ever known. They’d showered her with so much love she never wanted anything to spoil it, especially not now when they were both gone, especially not with Sandra Lange’s problems.

“How’d you do it?”

Kelly twisted in her seat, stared at Ross. “Excuse me?”

“Your car, pasted against that tree. How’d it happen?”

“I’m not sure.” She tried to recreate the sequence of events in her head. “The steering seemed wonky,” she mused.

“Wonky?” Ross put on his left signal and waited for a car to pass before he turned toward the church. “What does that mean?”

“Soft, spongy. Unresponsive.” What part didn’t he understand?

“Has it happened before?” He frowned when she shook her head. “It’s a new model, isn’t it?”

Kelly nodded. “I just got it in the fall.”

“Then it shouldn’t be a maintenance problem. Maybe some manufacturing defect is to blame.”

Remembering, she shuddered.

“I’m just glad I wasn’t on a freeway when it happened. As it was I missed a little boy by inches.” She chided herself for forgetting her manners. “I’m glad that you were driving past. Thank you.”

“No problem.”

She studied his thick jacket and jeans. “You’re not going to Ben and Leah’s wedding?”

“Nah. I’m not all that big on church stuff.” He pulled up near the door, glanced around. “Looks like you beat the bridal party to the church.”

“That’s a blessing. Thank you very much for coming to my rescue and for handling the tow for me, Ross.” She handed over her keys, then rested her hand on the door handle, wondering if she should say it. “You know they’d love you to come. Why don’t you at least attend the reception?”

“I’m waiting for a call from the lab,” he told her. “About the DNA tests.”

Kelly froze. She knew exactly what he was talking about. Both she and Ben had given samples for testing last week.

Don’t let me be her daughter!

“I didn’t realize you’d find out so soon,” Kelly whispered, staring at her feet. They were bare. She used her toes to grope for her shoes.

“You mean you were hoping.” His voice held a hint of condemnation.

“I have a full, rich life,” she told him, bristling a little. “I loved my parents. They gave me a wonderful life. It’s not that easy to suddenly accept that someone I’ve known for years could be my biological mother.”

“Someone you feel would take away the glory from your mother, is that what you’re saying?”

“I guess. Sort of.” It was more complicated than that, but Kelly had deliberately avoided probing her feelings to discover what lay beneath her sense of fear about this situation.

“Sandra’s not asking for anything, Kelly.” He reached out, touched the hand she’d clenched on her lap. “She just wants to know the child she gave birth to all those years ago.”

“So you’ve said.” Kelly opened the door, felt the sting of the cold crisp air hit her in a wave. Impulsively she turned, faced him. “But I already had a wonderful mother whom I dearly loved,” she blurted out. “Nobody can take her place.”

Kelly didn’t wait for the argument she knew would follow. She didn’t want to hear it. Instead she swung her legs out of the car, and rose. Then she bent and met his frowning stare.

“Tell Vinnie I’ll manage without the car until he gets it fixed. And thanks for the ride. I appreciate it very much.” She swung the door closed and hurried toward the church door, stuffing away all the doubts that had surfaced in the last few minutes.

“Please let it be Ben,” she murmured over and over as she hung up her coat, then was shown to her seat. “Please, please let Sandra’s child be Ben and not me.”

She sat in her pew, unable to relax until Reverend Fraser had taken his place at the front and Olivia, Ben’s precocious seven-year-old daughter began her stroll down the aisle, preceding the bride. She heard a rustle at the back and twisted in time to see Caleb and Anne sneak into a back pew. So they’d made it back from their honeymoon for the wedding! Caleb still had a week off from his duties as youth minister for the Chestnut Grove Youth Center and she’d specifically told Anne to forget about the books at Tiny Blessings for two weeks. Kelly suspected they’d disappear as quietly as they’d arrived to finish celebrating their own nuptials.

Anne looked so happy, so content. A frisson of envy twigged at her. It must be nice to have somebody to share with, somebody to help when life got to be too much.

Kelly pushed away the longing and turned back to concentrate on the ceremony. By the time the wedding march sounded, she’d almost convinced herself that everything in her world was just the same as it had always been.

Almost.

He didn’t belong here—not among these happy people, certainly not at a wedding reception where people celebrated marriage. The only thing Ross Van Zandt knew about marriage was that it didn’t work. Not for his dysfunctional family anyway.

Ross thrust away the past and concentrated on finding her among the guests now milling freely through the hall. He’d deliberately waited until the toasts were made, the speeches given, hoping not to ruin this lovely day.

Kelly was seated at a table with three other young women. Sandra had told him that four women had been friends for many years—Meg, Rachel, Pilar and Anne, who wasn’t at the table—and had a habit of meeting at Sandra’s Starlight Diner for brunch on Sundays. It was clear from their giggles and boisterous laughter now that they were trying to talk Kelly into joining them. By contrast, Kelly’s response sounded more restrained. He wondered if she was always so uptight, so restricted. If she ever let herself forget all the rules and relax.

“Ross?”

He wheeled around at the sound of his own name, found the groom standing to one side of the doorway, partially hidden by the massive potted palm that guarded the entrance.

“Hey, Ben. Congratulations.”

“Thanks.” Ben shook his hand while he studied his face. “You need to see Kelly,” he guessed.