The Daddy Secret

* * *

Mallory’s job interview, which had been at the Brighton Valley Medical Center, had gone well, and she suspected the HR director would be calling her for a follow-up interview in the next few days. She had all the qualifications they were looking for in the social worker position, as well as experience at a renowned Boston clinic. In addition to the professional references, she’d also listed a few notable locals, including the former Wexler district attorney, who’d been her grandfather’s golfing buddy.

Speaking of Grandpa, she hadn’t gotten by to visit him yet today, so she’d have to call him this evening. When she’d told him her plans to adopt Lucas, he’d been a little apprehensive at first, but he seemed to understand. She wasn’t sure how much he’d told his friends and associates yet. Alice Reilly knew, so she assumed others did, too.

She still hadn’t introduced the two of them. With Grandpa’s health what it was, she wasn’t sure how taxing that initial visit might be on him. She was also concerned about the effect an awkward meeting would have on her son.

Lucas knew the Dunlops had loved him from the start. They’d chosen him. He’d been their dream-come-true baby.

The adoption, while open, was also child-focused. So Lucas had always known Mallory was his birth mother. But he’d been calling her by her first name ever since he’d learned how to talk, and she’d come to expect it, to appreciate it. Up until his adoptive mother had died, the two of them had a relationship that had been more been more like aunt and nephew.

Just recently, their relationship had begun to change, though, and he’d starting to call her Mom—like he had last night. And she couldn’t be happier. But it was all so new, so fragile.

Mallory loved Lucas, and he knew it. But he also knew that she’d given him up to the Dunlops when he was a newborn. She hadn’t wanted him to think that she hadn’t loved him. Or that she hadn’t wanted to be his mother. So she’d let him think that at least part of it had been due to her youth and her obedience to her grandfather’s wishes.

Every day she did her best to let him know, one way or another, that she’d never give him up again. That she loved him more than life itself. And he seemed to believe her—thank God, because she meant it from the bottom of her heart.

She was proud of the child he’d become. And she knew her grandfather would be proud of him, too—given the chance. When the two finally met, she wanted everything to be...perfect. And it would be. Soon.

After unlocking the front door, she let herself into the living room. It was nearly five o’clock, and Rick would be coming soon. She wasn’t looking forward to their little chat, but he’d been right. The sooner they got it over with, the better.

She left her purse and heels at the stairs, planning to take them to her bedroom later. Then she went to the kitchen, her bare feet padding softly on the cool hardwood floor. She’d no more than poured herself a glass of iced tea when the doorbell rang. That had to be Rick. She took several refreshing swallows, then left the half-full glass on the counter and went to let him in.

As she opened the door, her heart scampered through her chest at the sight of him. He appeared professional again, in a pair of dark slacks and a white button-down shirt. Yet his hair was a bit mussed and rebellious, his eyes wary, his lips still sporting the hint of a scowl.

Would she ever know which Rick she’d meet on any given day?

“Come in,” she said, stepping aside so he could enter. “And have a seat.”

He slowly sauntered toward the sofa and sat down.

Mallory glanced down at her bare feet, at the pink polish on her toes, but she could feel his eyes on her, angry, hurt.

She didn’t like disappointing people, failing them. And while she’d done her best to make up for the one big mistake she’d made ten years ago, here was Rick, stabbing at her guilt and stirring up the old memories, the emotions all over again.

When she looked up, her gaze met his. She saw the accusation in his eyes. You lied to me.

He must have read the answer in her own because he shook his head and said, “You told me you were giving our child up so I’d sign those forms and relinquish custody.”

“I did give him up.”

“But Lucas looks just like me. And he called you Mom.”

When he’d recently begun to call her Mom it had warmed her heart to know that their relationship had truly begun to morph into the real deal. But now, she found herself having to explain why something so good, so sweet, wasn’t a bad thing.

“I told you that I was going to ask for an open adoption, remember? I even mentioned Sue and Gary Dunlop, the couple who adopted him. She was a nurse, and he was a fourth-grade teacher. They’d been married for nearly fifteen years, and while they’d tried for a long time, they couldn’t have kids. You would have loved them, Rick. They were awesome. Sue taught Sunday school at their church, and Gary used to coach Little League and soccer. I couldn’t have chosen better people to raise Lucas.”

His expression, once hard, seemed to soften a bit, yet doubt still troubled his eyes. “Lucas told me his dad died, but I assumed he meant your husband.”

“No, he was talking about Gary.” Mallory’s eyes filled with tears, just as they always did when she thought of the unfairness of it all, and her voice wobbled when she spoke. “Gary was diagnosed with cancer when Lucas was in first grade. He died a year later.”

Rick raked a hand through his hair, mussing it all the more. “And Sue?”

Mallory opened her mouth to speak, but the words didn’t form right away. If truth be told, she and Sue had grown really close over the years. Sue had become the big sister Mallory had never had, the mother figure she’d lost as an adolescent. The best friend she might never replace.

“Sue was...” Mallory cleared her throat, hoping the lingering grief would allow her to get the story out. “She died in a car accident last year.”

When Rick didn’t comment, she went on to explain. “After Gary died, Sue was concerned about what would happen to Lucas if she passed away. Neither she nor Gary had any close family—at least, not any they wanted to raise their son. So she asked me if I’d be his guardian if the unthinkable should happen.”

“And so you told her okay.”

“Of course. I love Lucas. And I loved Sue and Gary, too. I never really thought anything would happen to either of them, and when it did, I was as crushed as he was. It’s been tough on both Lucas and me, but we’re making the best of it.”

She glanced across the room at Rick, watching him, gauging his reaction. He remained silent for so long, she finally said, “You’re not saying anything.”

“Yes, I know. It’s a lot to think about. And I’m not sure how I feel. Confused and overwhelmed, I guess. But in a way, I feel cheated.”

“Why is that? You agreed to give him up.”

Those blue eyes struck something deep inside of her, setting her heart on end. “I offered to marry you, Mallory.”

“We were kids, Rick. You had no job. No way of supporting us. You were living with another family back then. Remember?”

“I know, but I was willing to do whatever I had to.”

Mallory crossed her arms. “And if we’d gotten married when we were teenagers, where would we be now?”

He shrugged. “Who the hell knows?”

She waited a beat, then asked, “So now what?”

He blew out a breath. “In some ways, I have no more to offer Lucas now than I did ten years ago, Mallory. I have no idea how to be a father. My old man used to beat me, that is, when he cared enough to come home. And when he was sober enough to stand up. And then, he took off one day and never came back.

“My uncle was better, at least to me and my brother. But when he drank, he used to abuse my aunt. You know all that. So my family history sucks. Yet now that Lucas is here in Brighton Valley, now that I’ve met him, I’d like the chance to get to know him. And I want him to know me.”

“Fair enough.” She got to her feet, deciding to put on her social worker hat for the time being. After all, she wasn’t so sure how to coparent with a guy like Rick, either. Or how he’d fit into her life after all these years. “Why don’t we take things slow and easy? We can both let things simmer, then talk more about it later.”

He pondered that for a moment. “I suppose that makes sense. I need to sort things out, too. How much time are you suggesting?”

“I’m not sure. Weeks. Maybe months.”

“Why so long?”

“Parenting is a big deal. I’ve never had to do it full-time. And neither have you. Lucas has been through so much recently, and he has a lot to sort through. I’m not sure introducing you to him as his birth father is a good idea right now.”

Rick stiffened. “Why not?”

“Well, because...” She took a deep breath, then slowly let it out. “Losing his parents was hard on him. And then there was the move. He left everything that was familiar, so it’s all been a big adjustment for him. And for me, too.”