Christmas Baby: A Baby Under the Tree / A Baby For Christmas / Her Christmas Hero

He would have been furious with her if he’d ever found out on his own and learned that she’d kept it from him. But right now, he didn’t know quite what to say. His emotions were flying around like stray bullets at a shoot-out—each spinning toward separate targets.

For some reason, thoughts of Marcia came back to taunt him, memories of her taking their toddler and moving out of town. The reminder served to blindside him, making it even more difficult to deal with Jillian’s news—and making it way more personal.

“I’m sorry,” she said.

“About what?”

“I don’t know. Dumping all of this on you, I guess. You must be worried about what this all means, but it doesn’t have to mean anything to you. I just thought you should know.” She bit down on her bottom lip, her mind undoubtedly going a mile a minute, just as his was doing.

He tried to wrap his mind around the fact that he was going to be a father again, but as he did, thoughts of Joey swept over him: the sight of the newborn coming into the world; that first flutter of a smile; the sight of the chubby baby pulling himself to a stand at the coffee table.

While he should look forward to the idea of having a second chance at fatherhood, the horrendous image of his eighteen-month-old son lying in a small, white, satin-lined casket chased away the sweet memories, and he feared what this might lead to…the anger, the pain, the grief.

After Shane and Marcia had split up, she’d moved out of state, taking Joey with her. Not only had Shane lost out on seeing his son from day to day, he’d been more than five-hundred miles away when he’d received word that he’d…lost him for good.

There was no way Shane wanted to go through that again. And while he had no idea how he would remedy that this time around, he knew he’d have to do something.

He glanced at Jillian, saw her pulling at her fingernail again—clearly worried, nervous and stressed about the situation.

It probably hadn’t been easy for her to deliver the news, and he was sorry that his initial reaction had been a little harsh.

“I didn’t mean to snap at you,” he said, his mind still reeling.

She smiled, then glanced away. “I understand.”

But she didn’t; she couldn’t.

He probably should tell her about Joey, about how he’d lost his son, about how he still ached with grief. But he didn’t think he could open his heart like that without choking up and falling apart.

Besides, the baby news had slammed into him like a runaway train, and it was too soon for him to have a rational reaction to it.

Even if he’d been happy to learn that he was going to be a father again, he wasn’t sure if he could trust her. What if Jillian took his baby away and never let him see it again?

He studied her for a moment, watched her slip her hand between the table and her belly, stroking her rounded womb as if caressing the child that grew there.

His child.

Her child.

Fear of repeating the past—the pain, the grief—threatened to suck the breath right out of him, but he couldn’t let it. He had to face the truth. He was going to be a father again.

And there was no reason history had to repeat itself.

“When’s the baby due?” he asked.

“December third.” Her gaze wrapped around his, and she smiled, a whisper of relief chasing away all signs of her nervousness.

How had he missed seeing it before—the obvious pregnancy, the maternal glow?

Jillian might have waited too damn long to tell him about the baby, but he sensed she was happy about the situation.

“Are you planning to drive back to Houston tonight?” he asked.

She caught his gaze. “Actually, I didn’t like the idea of being on the road after dark, so I got a room at the Night Owl.”

“You could have stayed with me.”

“I… Well, I suppose I could have, but I wasn’t sure how you’d take the news. And I figured things might be a little awkward between us.”

“Maybe so, but we’ll need to deal with the situation anyway.” And some of it was going to be tough.

Shane scanned the honky-tonk, and when he spotted Trina, he motioned for her to come to the table.

“Are you hungry?” he asked Jillian.

“A little.”

When Trina reached the table, Shane said, “We’d like to place an order to go.”

“All right. I’ll get you a couple of menus.” When she returned, she handed each of them the new, one-sided laminated sheet of cardstock that offered a few appetizers and various sandwiches. “I’ll give you a chance to look this over, then I’ll be back.”

“Where are we going?” Jillian asked him.

“When I thought we were just tiptoeing around our attraction and a possible romance, I figured the Stagecoach Inn would be good place to kick up our heels and forget all the reasons why a long-distance relationship wouldn’t work out. But now that things have taken an unexpected turn, we need to find a quieter spot so we can talk.”

Jillian didn’t respond.

Moments later, Trina returned for their orders.

“I’ll have the soup and salad combo,” Jillian said.

Shane chose the bacon cheeseburger and fries.

“You got it.” Trina scratched out their requests on her pad before taking the order to the kitchen.

While Shane and Jillian waited for their food, they made small talk about the music on the jukebox and some of the more interesting characters who had begun to fill the honky-tonk. Yet the tension stretched between them like a worn-out bungee cord ready to snap.

Before long, Trina returned with a take-home bag, as well as the bill. Shane paid the tab, leaving her a generous tip.

“Are you ready?” he asked Jillian, as he scooted back his chair and got to his feet.

Jillian stood and reached for her purse. “So where did you decide to eat?”

“You said you had a room at the Night Owl. Let’s go there.”

If she had any reservations about taking him back to the motel with her, she didn’t say. And Shane was glad. It was important that they take some time to really get to know each other.

And the sooner they got started doing that, the better.