How to Win a Guy in 10 Dates

‘If you must know, when it comes to it, they never hold my interest. One night and I’ve seen all they have to offer. Two max. Then I’m all ready for the next.’

‘Perhaps you’re dating the wrong kind of woman.’ Cassie said.

‘Meaning?’

Ed saw Will narrow his eyes at Cassie, warning her. With Cassie in full force a guy needed his wingman.

‘I’m not backing off here, Will.’ She sounded fierce. ‘Ed’s always surrounded by women, hoards of them. All desperate to jump onto his love conveyor-belt, all desperate to be the one who gets to hang on in there. But let’s face it, you are a great looking guy with an even greater personality when you want to be, but those women have got their eye on the contents of your wallet more than on your personal attributes. And their desperation to get their hooks into you, and gain access to your billions must make them much more compliant than they otherwise might be. And in my book, compliant equals boring. Be honest Ed, when did you last date a woman who challenged you?’

Ed opened his mouth to answer then shut it again when he couldn’t remember an instance.

‘These polished, high maintenance females, solely attracted to your bank-balance, can’t give you more than one night of distraction. It’s obvious.’

‘You talk about it as if I even give a damn.’ He shot her a pointed grin. ‘I don’t. I’m happy with things as they are.’

‘You tell him Will. You’re his oldest friend after all.’

Cassie appealing to Will? Again? Twice in the course of two minutes.

‘She might have a point.’ Will’s tone was measured. He threw in a conciliatory qualifier. ‘Maybe.’

Now that was an unlikely alliance.

Ed swallowed his distaste. ‘How you two have both survived a decade of serial monogamy without dying of boredom is beyond me, but seeing as you are setting yourselves up as experts here, what do you suggest?’

He hesitated, waited for their responses, which weren’t as immediate as he’d expected, and seized on their silence. ‘There, not so easy is it?’

Cassie tapped her teeth with one crimson nail as she thought. ‘This isn’t something we can rush. It’s too important for that. For starters, I’m thinking you need to choose someone who has no idea you have money. And you need to see her more than twice – give yourself a chance to get to know her properly.’

Ed squirmed. ‘I think I liked you better when you were telling me not to drink so much.’

Will chimed in, ‘Think of it as a challenge. We can add in some motivators, obviously.’

Motivators? Just like Will to know how to make him bite.

‘I haven’t agreed to this.’ It was important to protest, but as soon as Ed heard the word ‘challenge’, he knew he was in. It would shut them up and get them off his back once and for all. Then afterwards the only person he had to please was himself.

Will rubbed his hands. ‘So, down to business. Let’s say ten dates?’ He wrinkled his forehead as he thought. ‘To include at least two nights away – the wonders of the mini-break and all that.’

‘Ten?’ Ed felt his jaw drop.

‘If you’re going to do it, you may as well do it properly.’ Cassie flapped her hands in excited anticipation.

‘And you mustn’t reveal how much you’re worth .… ’ Will added.

‘Or use luxury props or enticements.’ Cassie said quickly. ‘And no sex on the first date.’

Ed shook his head in protest. ‘Hang on; I draw the line at that.’

‘Fine, whatever, but if you’ve got any sense you’ll keep to that anyway.’ Cassie grinned at him. ‘Even if you don’t meet the love of your life with this, you might improve your dating habits. Though frankly they don’t sound like they could get any worse.’

‘Don’t be so sure. I always practise safe sex.’ He flashed her a smirk.

‘There will have to be sex at some stage, or it won’t count either.’ Cassie was quickly getting carried away. ‘And we need to meet her on one of the dates, and it would be good for you to meet her family too.’

‘No pressure there then?’ Ed raised his eyebrows. This was in danger of getting out of hand. ‘So before Cassie adds in any more clauses, what about the carrot, Will? What are you offering?’

‘It’ll have to be good. What do I have that you’ve always coveted? My first-edition Definitely, Maybe album? Yours, if you complete the challenge, regardless of the outcome?’

‘You know you can do better than that, Will.’

‘Okay. Throw in the ski lodge in Klosters too, if you must. It’d be good to know it’s in safe hands with you. Might make you take a holiday at last.’

‘Great, you’re on. And the stick will be that if I fail to complete, I’ll give you my Jarvis Cocker signed T-shirt.’

‘Add in your Edinburgh town house, and we have a deal. I fancy the idea of wearing a kilt.’

‘Fair enough. Though there’s no risk you’ll be getting it – I’ll manage ten dates with my eyes closed. And one last thing… A measure of how confident I am that this whole stunt will ultimately fail.’ Ed swayed back on his heels, and locked eyes with Will. ‘If I find a woman I fall in love with, I’m ready to gift you my vintage Aston Martin.’

‘But come on, you’d never give that up!’ Cassie looked shocked.

‘Exactly!’ His face split into the widest smile. ‘There’s absolutely no danger that I’m going to have to!’

***

‘All set?’

A bright Monday morning, one month later, Ed kicked a foot in the dust as he waited. Digging his hands into his pockets, he stared around the quarry, wondering when he became so removed from the place where he’d had his first taste of the explosions – a taste that had turned into a lifetime obsession. He’d promised the quarry Manager, Blake he’d be here today, when they’d met up at his parents’ party, and he didn’t like to let Blake down. Not after everything Blake had done for him, in those bad old days when Ed was fourteen and a hell-raiser.

‘Ready to go.’ Blake gave him a nod. ‘Jeans and tee okay for you? Sorry, but they’re the best I could muster from the lads. This is Derbyshire, not London, remember.’

‘My fault I ripped the sump of the car then proceeded to smear the contents all over myself. I’ll take what I can get.’ Ed gave a rueful grin, as he looked down at the indecently tight jeans complete with rips, and the saggy, beyond-hope t-shirt someone had donated to his cause. He exhaled deeply, as he glanced at his shiny sports car, waiting for the recovery vehicle by the gate. He, of all people, should have known better. Would have known better if he’d been half-way concentrating, instead of raging because a month into this Dating Challenge, he still hadn’t found a suitable woman. Damn his sister and her determination to make sure the whole world paired up into happy couples. If he hadn’t been fuming about the Coupledom Challenge, instead of looking out for ruts in the ground, he’d still have a working car. He’d have to make do with the quarry Land Rover until a replacement arrived.

‘I feel like we should be smashing bottles of champagne against the cliffs, given all the effort we’ve put into getting the permissions to extend the quarry. I guess we’ll have just have to make do with the big bang instead,’ Ed said, a grin of anticipation playing on his lips. ‘Whenever you’re ready.’

However many explosions he saw, he never tired of the thrill of a good blast. Ten years in the boardroom and yet the warning siren’s wail still sent prickles across the back of his neck as he trained his eyes on the rock face. Then in the split second before the blast, a rider on a horse cut across the skyline, up behind the blast area.

What the hell? There shouldn’t be anyone up there!

Then the boom of the blast smacked against his body, and he heard the echoing thud as the rock-face collapsed. But Ed wasn’t watching the falling rock. Because above it, the horse was jack-knifing into the air. Against the backdrop of the perfect blue sky Ed watched transfixed, as the horse and rider separated, and the rider tumbled downwards, out of view. Then the dust rose, in billowing rolls over the rock-pile, and just before the dust haze turned the blue sky grey, he saw the rider less horse galloping against the horizon.

‘There’s a problem in the field up there! Damned stupid riders.’ Ed hurled himself in the direction of the Land Rover, grinding his teeth on grit.

Within seconds he was roaring towards the quarry gate, powered by a whole mountain of wrath. He was still cursing, minutes later, up in the field, as he jumped down beside the casualty.

A girl. And the fact she’d left her riding hat on the gatepost suggested she had no brains to protect. A blonde, albeit a dirty one. Spread-eagled on the grass. In tiny shorts, and with curvy, honeyed legs, that sent crackles up his spine and made him remind himself he shouldn’t be noticing.

His eye snagged on the tendrils of a tattoo that emerged from the top of her boot.