Autumn's Awakening

Reluctant to talk about the past, but even more reluctant to leave him, she settled back into the chair.

Without meeting his eyes, she said, “When I confessed to Daddy that I—” she hesitated, and chose different words “—was interested in you, he was so angry, he threatened to cut off all my funds until I came to my senses. My mother wanted me to marry Harrison Lowe. She was ambitious for her daughters, and when Harrison showed some interest in me, she decided I’d make a good doctor’s wife.”

“But you wanted to be a veterinarian.”

“That’s true. I’d wanted to be a vet since I was a child and had seen Doc Wheeler save one of our colts. I wasn’t surprised that Mother would disagree, but I was sure Daddy would be on my side. He always had been before.”

Autumn paused, recalling the year she’d been spent in an expensive boarding school in the East. Her parents’ plans to prepare her for a social life had ebbed when she came home for the Christmas holidays and met Nathan. By the end of the first year, she’d made up her mind that she wouldn’t return to the boarding school—a decision that had intensified when she reached the farm and found Nathan working for her father.

Wondering what Autumn was thinking that had caused sadness to overspread her face, Nathan recalled that his uncle had told him how disappointed the Weavers had been when their oldest daughter, Spring, had married a missionary and moved to Bolivia. The second daughter, Summer, was a shy girl, and Clara Weaver was determined that Autumn would be trained to carry on the aristocratic Weaver tradition. Had his appearance in her life caused Autumn to rebel against her parents? Nathan wondered how much he was responsible for changing the vivacious, laughing girl he’d known into this serious woman with a resigned look on her face.

“Harrison was all right, but I didn’t want to marry him, and I wasn’t going to fight with Mother about it. When I learned you’d gone without even saying goodbye, I left, too. I didn’t tell anyone where I was going. As a matter of fact, I didn’t know what I was going to do when I drove away from Greensboro.”

She paused, and the bleak expression in her eyes deepened as she remembered vividly the lost, hopeless feeling she’d experienced that day.

“So what did you do?”

She laughed slightly and the sparkle in her blue eyes dissolved some of the fatigue lines on her face. “I decided to travel. Trina is a cousin of Bert Brown, who’s married to my sister, Spring. Trina and I met at their wedding, and we kept in touch by letter after that. She’d invited me to visit her, and when I had no other place to go, I went to see her in Nashville. I took all the money from my savings account that I’d been accumulating since I was a child, and when I got to Columbus I sold my sports car. I had enough money to last me for a while.”

“I remember that sports car! Wasn’t it hard to give up?”

“Not really. Daddy bought it for me when I graduated from high school. I wanted a pickup truck instead, but Mother objected that it wasn’t a suitable vehicle for me, so they gave me an expensive car. When I needed money, I was glad I had it. Trina was getting ready to go to a Christian youth conference in London, and since I had nothing else to do, I tagged along.”

Autumn paused, thinking about the conference that had introduced her to a whole new way of life. Trina had jokingly called her a heathen, because she knew nothing about what it meant to be a Christian. Except for a few weddings and funerals, Autumn had never attended a church service, but after she spent two weeks at that conference, she’d become a student of the Bible, trying to span her gulf of ignorance about spiritual matters. She’d come to believe the Gospel message, but even yet, she couldn’t submit wholly to Christ’s lordship. Looking at Nathan’s interested eyes across the table, she knew she couldn’t expect God to forgive her own sins until she’d received forgiveness from Nathan and her parents for the past.

“And then what?” Nathan prompted.

“After the conference, with a group of youths and a couple of adult advisors, we backpacked several months on the continent of Europe. We’d travel until we ran out of money, then we’d find work, usually on farms. Trina was a city girl, but she became interested in animals, and we decided to go to vet school. I had $5.25 in my pocket when I got off the plane in Milwaukee.”

“How did you manage to go to college? Did your father help you?”

“I’ve had no contact with my family since I left. I learned through my sister, Spring, that Daddy had disowned me, saying I would never be welcome at Indian Creek Farm again. I guess I’m as stubborn as he is, so I didn’t ask him for anything.”

“You didn’t know your mother is ill?”

“Not until I saw Ray last month. He told me she’s an invalid and also how Daddy has let the farm run down. Those are the reasons I said I might have been better off to stay away. I can’t bear to think of my home and family deteriorating when there’s nothing I can do about it.”

“Where did you go to school?” Nathan asked, wanting to learn everything he could about those years Autumn had been lost to him.

“At the University of Wisconsin.”

“Why Wisconsin?”

“Trina’s sister lives in Milwaukee, and after we got back from Europe, she offered us a place to stay until we got settled. Too, it was far enough away from Ohio that I didn’t think I’d encounter anyone I knew.”

“That school has a good reputation.”

Autumn nodded. “I already had one year of college, and some of my credits were accepted at Wisconsin. By taking classes year-round, we graduated last month. There were times when I wondered if I’d ever graduate, for, to pay our expenses, Trina and I started a cleaning business. We hired other students to work for us. We cleaned office buildings at night, and we didn’t have much time to study.”

“And your father sitting here with his pockets full of money!”

“If I’d done what my parents wanted, they’d have taken care of me, but I didn’t choose to do that.” She stood up and stretched. “Thanks for the breakfast. I’ll check on the cow, and then I’ll head back to Greensboro.”

He walked with her to the barn, where they found Tony still sleeping on the hay, and the cow contentedly chewing her cud.

“You saved the cow for me, Autumn, and I appreciate your coming to help. I can’t afford to lose any livestock. I’m operating on a shoestring.” He took her hand in a firm shake. “You’re going to be a good vet. I’m glad you had the courage to get what you wanted in life.”

Not everything I wanted, she thought, for she’d never gotten over losing him. She wouldn’t meet Nathan’s gaze, fearing he could read the emotion in her eyes.

As they strolled toward the truck, Nathan said, “Hearing your story has cleared up something that’s bothered me since I came to Greensboro. It took me months to convince people that you and I hadn’t been living together the years I was away.”

Autumn stared at him. “What?”

“That’s right. And I understand why now. If you left the day after I did, and no one knew where either of us was, they jumped to a wrong conclusion. I wouldn’t have mentioned it, but someone might say something to you.”

“I won’t be here very long, so perhaps I won’t have to answer questions about my past.”

Nathan watched as she got into Ray’s truck and started the engine. Before she drove away, Autumn looked directly into his gray eyes and said, “I don’t expect you to forgive me, Nathan, but that day after Daddy fired you, I told him that I was to blame for what happened between us. He didn’t believe me, but as soon as I could, I came to Woodbeck Farm. By that time you were already gone, and your uncle wouldn’t tell me where you were. There was no way to make restitution, but I’ve always wanted to see you again and tell you I was sorry.”

He held up his hand. “Don’t be so hard on yourself, Autumn. I was as much to blame as you. We were both too young to be making decisions for the future. It’s okay.”

“I hope so. Anyway, I’m thankful that God brought us together again so I could apologize.”

He nodded, and the warmth in his steady, gray eyes made her hopeful. “It’s good to see you again. Autumn.”

Chapter Three

When Autumn reached the highway, she took the long way back to Greensboro. She had to deal with this surprise meeting with Nathan before she talked to Trina or Miss Olive. In spite of the lack of sleep she’d had, Autumn couldn’t remember when she’d felt so exhilarated. After being empty for eight years, a part of her had suddenly been filled when Nathan took her hand and said, “Welcome home, Autumn.”

What had drawn her to Nathan in the first place? What had captivated her so forcefully that no other man had ever seemed worthy of her attention? With the window down, and the wind fluffing her curly red hair around her face, she drove slowly over roads that had been familiar to her in the past.

Perhaps one reason she cherished his friendship was that he’d come into her life on a Christmas Eve when she desperately needed help. Her father was returning from a Belgian horse association meeting. Her mother, Clara, and sister, Summer, had gone to the airport to meet him, while Autumn stayed at home. A freak snowstorm had delayed Landon’s flight, and Clara and Summer were marooned at the airport.

Resigned to spending Christmas Eve alone, Autumn had turned on the in-house monitoring system that Landon used to survey what was going on in the horse barns. Autumn loved watching the horses. She scanned the huge, well-lit barn with its comfortable box stalls, the huge reddish horses munching slowly on their supper of oats mixed with molasses. All seemed well until she looked at Tulip in the last stall. Instead of eating, Landon’s prize brood mare paced restlessly, acting colicky. Landon Weaver’s horses didn’t get the colic, and Autumn had known immediately what was wrong. Tulip was getting ready to foal.

Autumn had telephoned for the veterinarian immediately, only to learn from Miss Olive that Ray Wheeler was out on a call. Under ordinary conditions, the mare could deliver her foal without any assistance, but if there was trouble, it could mean the loss of the mare or foal. Autumn drew on heavy clothes and fought her way to the barn through the swirling snow. She’d helped her father many times when a mare needed assistance, but she was afraid to try it by herself.

Autumn was busily preparing the foaling stall, when a slender young man walked into the barn. Pulling a red snow-covered cap from his dark-brown hair, he’d said in a hesitant voice, “I’m Nathan Holland. I’m visiting my uncle at Woodbeck Farm, and he volunteered my assistance to clean the barns while Mr. Weaver’s been gone. Uncle was afraid this storm would delay your father’s return, and he asked me to drive over and check on the horses.”

“Oh, I’m so glad to see you,” Autumn said, warming to the sincerity in his slate-gray eyes and the slight smile on his sensitive, well-formed mouth. “One of the horses is going to foal, and I need help.”

He laughed lowly, and Autumn liked the sound. “Shouldn’t you call a vet? I’m a city boy. I won’t be much help.”

“I can tell you what to do,” Autumn had assured him, and the two of them had worked companionably as they padded the foaling stall and moved the large Belgian into place. Then they’d gone into Landon’s office to monitor the mare’s progress on the television screen. While they munched on snacks Autumn had found in the refrigerator, she had told Nathan of her desire to be a vet.

“Seems like that would be a good job for you,” he’d said. “I’d go for it.”

“What would you like to do, Nathan?” she’d asked, for they’d started out on a first-name basis.