But the young girl, brusquely taking the role of savior which she had imposed upon herself, rejoined:
"No, mamma, I am no longer a child, and I have the right to know. I know that we receive persons of bad repute, adventurers, and I know that, on that account, people do not respect us. I know more. Well, it must not be, any longer, do you hear? I do not wish it. We will go away: you will sell your jewels; we will work, if need be, and we will live as honest women, somewhere very far away. And if I can marry, so much the better."
She answered: "You are crazy. You will do me the favor to rise and come down to breakfast with all the rest."
"No, mamma. There is some one whom I shall never see again, you understand me. I want him to leave, or I shall leave. You shall choose between him and me."
She was sitting up in bed, and she raised her voice, speaking as they do on the stage, playing, finally, the drama which she had dreamed, almost forgetting her grief in the effort to fulfill her mission.
The Marquise, stupefied, again repeated: "You are crazy – " not finding anything else to say.
Yvette replied with a theatrical energy: "No, mamma, that man shall leave the house, or I shall go myself, for I will not weaken."
"And where will you go? What will you do?"
"I do not know, it matters little – I want you to be an honest woman."
These words which recurred, aroused in the Marquise a perfect fury, and she cried:
"Be silent. I do not permit you to talk to me like that. I am as good as anybody else, do you understand? I lead a certain sort of life, it is true, and I am proud of it; the 'honest women' are not as good as I am."
Yvette, astonished, looked at her, and stammered: "Oh! mamma!"
But the Marquise, carried away with excitement, continued:
"Yes, I lead a certain life – what of it? Otherwise you would be a cook, as I was once, and earn thirty sous a day. You would be washing dishes, and your mistress would send you to market – do you understand – and she would turn you out if you loitered, just as you loiter, now because I am – because I lead this life. Listen. When a person is only a nursemaid, a poor girl, with fifty francs saved up, she must know how to manage, if she does not want to starve to death; and there are not two ways for us, there are not two ways, do you understand, when we are servants. We cannot make our fortune with official positions, nor with stockjobbing tricks. We have only one way – only one way."
She struck her breast as a penitent at the confessional, and flushed and excited, coming toward the bed, she continued: "So much the worse. A pretty girl must live or suffer – she has no choice!" Then returning to her former idea: "Much they deny themselves, your 'honest women.' They are worse, because nothing compels them. They have money to live on and amuse themselves, and they choose vicious lives of their own accord. They are the bad ones in reality."
She was standing near the bed of the distracted Yvette, who wanted to cry out "Help," to escape. Yvette wept aloud, like children who are whipped. The Marquise was silent and looked at her daughter, and, seeing her overwhelmed with despair, felt, herself, the pangs of grief, remorse, tenderness, and pity, and throwing herself upon the bed with open arms, she also began to sob and stammered:
"My poor little girl, my poor little girl, if you knew, how you were hurting me." And they wept together, a long while.
Then the Marquise, in whom grief could not long endure, softly rose, and gently said:
"Come, darling, it is unavoidable; what would you have? Nothing can be changed now. We must take life as it comes to us."
Yvette continued to weep. The blow had been too harsh and too unexpected to permit her to reflect and to recover at once.
Her mother resumed: "Now, get up and come down to breakfast, so that no one will notice anything."
The young girl shook her head as if to say, "No," without being able to speak. Then she said, with a slow voice full of sobs:
"No, mamma, you know what I said, I won't alter my determination. I shall not leave my room till they have gone. I never want to see one of those people again, never, never. If they come back, you will see no more of me."
The Marquise had dried her eyes, and wearied with emotion, she murmured:
"Come, reflect, be reasonable."
Then, after a moment's silence:
"Yes, you had better rest this morning. I will come up to see you this afternoon." And having kissed her daughter on the forehead, she went to dress herself, already calmed.
Yvette, as soon as her mother had disappeared, rose, and ran to bolt the door, to be alone, all alone; then she began to think. The chambermaid knocked about eleven o'clock, and asked through the door: "Madame the Marquise wants to know if Mademoiselle wishes anything, and what she will take for her breakfast."
Yvette answered: "I am not hungry, I only ask not to be disturbed."
And she remained in bed, just as if she had been ill. Toward three o'clock, some one knocked again. She asked:
"Who is there?"
It was her mother's voice which replied: "It is I, darling, I have come to see how you are."
She hesitated what she should do. She opened the door, and then went back to bed. The Marquise approached, and, speaking in low tones, as people do to a convalescent, said:
"Well, are you better? Won't you eat an egg?"
"No, thanks, nothing at all."
Madame Obardi sat down near the bed. They remained without saying anything, then, finally, as her daughter stayed quiet, with her hands inert upon the bedclothes, she asked:
"Don't you intend to get up?"
Yvette answered: "Yes, pretty soon."
Then in a grave and slow tone she said: "I have thought a great deal, mamma, and this – this is my resolution. The past is the past, let us speak no more of it. But the future shall be different or I know what is left for me to do. Now, let us say no more about it."
The Marquise, who thought the explanation finished, felt her impatience gaining a little. It was too much. This big goose of a girl ought to have known about things long ago. But she did not say anything in reply, only repeating:
"You are going to get up?"
"Yes, I am ready."
Then her mother became maid for her, bringing her stockings, her corset, and her skirts. Then she kissed her.
"Will you take a walk before dinner?"
"Yes, mamma."
And they took a stroll along the water, speaking only of commonplace things.
CHAPTER IV
FROM EMOTION TO PHILOSOPHY
The following day, early in the morning, Yvette went out alone to the place where Servigny had read her the history of the ants. She said to herself:
"I am not going away from this spot without having formed a resolution."