Skulduggery Pleasant: Books 7 - 9

“So what?”

“So what can you tell us about him?”

Ravel laughed. “Me? I knew him as well as you did, which wasn’t very well. Why don’t you look up his file?”

“We did. His files are missing.”

“Missing? Then why would you think I’d know anything?”

“Because you’re the Grand Mage,” Skulduggery said. “You have access to the Elders’ Journals.”

“Oh,” said Ravel. “Oh, yeah.”

Skulduggery tilted his head. “You have read them, haven’t you? One of the requirements for taking a seat on the Council is you have to read the Journals of those who have gone before.”

“I was getting around to it,” Ravel said, a little defensively. “I was about to start, but... Listen, being an Elder is not an easy job. I rarely sleep, did you know that? I go to bed late, I get up early. Every day I’m in meetings or briefings or I’m doing this or that. I would love the opportunity to take a few afternoons off and read those Journals, I really would. The chance to learn from the wisdom of past Elders... It would be an honour, and I’m looking forward to it.”

Skulduggery nodded. “There are three hundred and forty-four Journals.”

Ravel blanched. “Seriously?”

“All big leather-bound books, a thousand pages long. Single-spaced.”

“Dear God.”

“It’s going to take more than a few afternoons to get through them.”

“So it would appear.” Ravel scowled. “OK, you caught me out, I haven’t read the dusty old diaries. Big deal. I’ll get to it. Ghastly, you’ve read them, what can you tell us about Lament?”

“Uh,” said Ghastly.

Skulduggery shook his head. “Oh, not you, too.”

“One of them is on my bedside table,” Ghastly said quickly. “I started it. I did. But my God it was boring. It was all ‘forsooth’ and ‘verily’ and ‘forthwith’. Did we really speak like that back then?”

“So no one has actually read the Journals,” Skulduggery said. “Is that what you’re trying to tell me?”

Ravel and Ghastly both looked sheepish. Finally, Madame Mist spoke.

“I have read them.”

Ravel looked startled. “You have? You didn’t find them... boring?”

“I find many things boring,” Mist said in that quiet way of hers. “It does not mean I’m going to forsake my duty.”

“Well, good,” Skulduggery said, “at least someone here is doing what they’re supposed to. What can you tell us?”

Madame Mist observed him through her veil. “Nothing,” she said.

“Lament wasn’t mentioned?”

“He was mentioned, but I cannot tell you in what context. Only Elders are allowed to know what those Journals contain.”

“Well, we can tell Skulduggery and Valkyrie,” Ravel said.

“No. We can’t.”

Ghastly sat forward so as to look at Mist better. “Yes, we can. They’ve earned that right.”

“It is not for us to decide,” said Mist. “It is a rule.”

“We’re breaking the rule,” said Ravel. “Today that rule is broken. I’m Elder Mage, I decree it. The rule is no more. So tell them what the Journals said.”

“If we want to change the rules, we must vote on it. It need not be unanimous. A simple majority would suffice.”

“So you’re looking for a two-to-one majority,” sighed Ghastly, “when you know exactly how myself and Ravel are going to vote? What’s the point?”

“It is the rules, Elder Bespoke.”

“Fine. All in favour of telling Skulduggery and Valkyrie what the Journals say, raise your hand.” Ghastly and Ravel voted. “There. Two-to-one. We win. Now, if you would be so kind – what did the Journals say about Lament?”

“Tyren Lament was a detective under Meritorious,” Mist said, “specialising in science-magic.”

“That much I know,” said Skulduggery.

“There were others, but their names weren’t mentioned and a definitive number was never given. Lament and his colleagues were a specialist group, tasked with dealing with global threats in as quiet a manner as possible. Meritorious and the Elders spoke very highly of them, but provided few details as to their assignments. There were notes on some low-profile arrests at the beginning of Lament’s Sanctuary career, but even that tailed off.”

“What about Argeddion?” asked Valkyrie. “Was he ever mentioned?”

“No. Neither was the disappearance of Lament and his group.”

“So they vanish off the face of the earth,” Skulduggery said, “and none of the Elders even bother to make a note of it. It sounds like Lament and his friends were Black Ops, the same as our Dead Men, or Guild’s Exigency Mages, but in peacetime. The dirty jobs that have to be done. They went in to take down Argeddion and whatever happened has been wiped from official records. Meritorious covered it up.”

“Not the first time,” Ghastly murmured.

“But wouldn’t that mean Argeddion is dead?” asked Valkyrie. “If they went in and failed, Meritorious would have just sent someone else. He’d probably have sent you. But he didn’t.”

Skulduggery nodded. “Which would seem to indicate that it was mission accomplished.”

Ravel shifted in his chair. “So if everyone who knew about this mission is now dead, where does that leave us?”

“Maybe not everyone,” Skulduggery countered. “Lament may have been killed, maybe most of the others, but there’s no reason to think there wasn’t a survivor who reported back to Meritorious when it was done.”

Valkyrie looked at him. “So we need to find out who else was in Lament’s group. How do we do that?”

Skulduggery put his hat on. “In order to find a man’s friends, who are the best people to ask?”

Valkyrie smiled. “His enemies.”