An Engagement in Seattle: Groom Wanted

Her first instinct was to put him off, to thwart him again, but a kiss seemed like such a simple way to ease her conscience. His touch had always been tender, as if he understood and appreciated her need for gentleness.

“Yes,” she agreed breathlessly.

Her back was against the wall and his arms went around her waist. Unsure what to do with her own hands, she splayed them across his chest. He pulled her against him, and for a long moment he held her, as if savoring the feel of her in his arms.

The trembling returned and Julia closed her eyes. She could smell his cologne, feel his heart beat beneath her flattened palms. His breath echoed in her ears and rustled her hair.

His mouth met hers. His touch was light and brief. She tipped her head back and her eyes drifted shut as his mouth brushed hers again. And again. A sigh worked its way through her as his tongue outlined the shape of her mouth. After a series of nibbling kisses, he caught her lower lip between his teeth.

Julia held her breath, unable to respond. She was content to let him be the aggressor, to allow him to touch her and kiss her without fully participating herself.

But her lack of involvement obviously bothered Alek.

“Julia,” he pleaded, “kiss me back.”

Tentatively, shyly, her mouth opened to him and he moaned, then deepened the kiss. His arms tightened their hold and he slanted his mouth over hers. Strange, unwelcome pleasure rippled through her body.

She sighed at the sensations she experienced; she couldn’t help it. She felt hot and shaky, as though she’d suffered a near miss, as though she’d stepped off a curb and felt the rush of a car passing by and come within inches of being struck.

Her hands, which had seemed so useless moments before, were buried in his dark hair. Her body, so long untouched, felt about to explode. She moved against him, clinging to him, fighting back tears.

The sound of someone clearing his throat broke the spell. Alek stilled, as did Julia. Slowly, reluctantly, she opened her eyes to find half of the reception guests lined up in the hall watching them.

Jerry stood in the background, smiling broadly. He gave her a thumbs-up, looking ecstatic. If they were hoping to fool their guests, they’d succeeded beyond her brother’s expectations.

As though loath to do it, Alek released her. He seemed perturbed by the interruption and muttered something she didn’t understand.

“I’ll change clothes,” she said, hurriedly moving into the room. She was grateful there was a chair. Sinking down onto it, she pressed her hands to her red face and closed her eyes. She felt as if she’d leapt off a precipice in the dark and had no idea of where she’d be landing. A kiss that had begun as a compromise had become something else. She’d been trying to soothe her conscience, but instead had added to her growing list of offenses, leading Alek to believe he should expect more.

Julia took her time changing. Fifteen minutes later she reappeared in a bright red flowered dress she’d found in the back of her closet. These days she dressed mostly in business suits—jackets, straight skirts and plain white blouses. The dress was a leftover from her college days. The design was simple and stylish.

Alek was pacing the hallway anxiously.

“I’m sorry I took so long.”

His smile was enthusiastic. He touched her lips, still swollen from his kiss. The color hadn’t faded from her cheeks, either; if anything, it had deepened with this fresh appraisal.

“I…promised my grandmother we’d stop in at the hospital after the reception,” Julia said nervously. “I’d hate to disappoint her.”

“By all means we will see her.”

They said their farewells and left the reception. Julia knew the minute they walked into Ruth’s hospital room that she’d been waiting for them. Her grandmother’s smile was filled with love as she held her hands out to them.

Julia rushed forward and hugged her. She was reminded each and every time she saw her grandmother that Ruth was close to death. She clung to life, not for herself, but for Julia’s sake. It hurt her to know Ruth was in pain. Why did those who were good always have to suffer? Why couldn’t God spare her grandmother just a few more years? This day, her wedding day, had started a cauldron of emotions churning in her mind. She couldn’t bear to think of what her life would be like without her grandmother.

It had been Ruth’s kindness that had gotten her through Roger’s deception and her father’s death. Otherwise, Julia feared she would’ve ended up in a mental ward.

Other emotions long buried and ignored came to the surface, as well. Kissing Alek had stirred up needs and desires she’d assumed were lost to her.

There were no answers, at least none she felt confident enough to face. Only myriad questions that assailed her on every front. She couldn’t trust herself; her power to discern had been sadly lacking once and had cost her and her family dearly. She dared not trust herself a second time.

She was married to a man she didn’t love, a man who didn’t love her, either. To complicate everything, her grandmother was dying. This was what her life had come down to. A loveless marriage and a desperate loneliness.

When Julia released her grandmother, Ruth looked up and brushed the tears from Julia’s cheeks. “You’re crying?” she asked softly. “This should be the happiest day of your life.”

Alek placed his arm around Julia’s waist and helped her into the chair next to the bed. He stood behind her, his hands resting lightly on her shoulders. Julia pressed Ruth’s hand to her cheek and held it there. Her grandmother seemed much weaker today.

“I remember when I married Louis,” she said with a wistful smile.

Her grandfather had been dead many years now. He was only a vague memory to Julia, who guessed she’d been about seven or eight when he died.

“I was frightened out of my wits.”

“Frightened?” Julia didn’t understand.

“I wondered if I was doing the right thing. There were very few divorces in those days and if a woman happened to marry the wrong man, she was often sentenced to a miserable life.”

“But I thought you’d known him for a long time.”

Ruth arched one delicate brow. “A long time?” she repeated. “In a manner of speaking, you’re right. But we’d only gone out on a handful of dates before we were married.”

“I’d always assumed you knew Grandpa for years.”

Ruth’s hand stroked Julia’s cheek. “It’s true that in the early days Louis worked for my father at the paint company my family owned. I’d see him now and then when I dropped in at the office, but those times were rare.”

Julia was enthralled. She knew her grandmother had deeply loved her grandfather, but she couldn’t remember ever hearing the story of their courtship.

“When did you fall in love?”

“Louis stopped working for my father, and Dad was furious with him. They were both strong-willed men and it seemed they were constantly disagreeing. Louis started his own business in direct competition with my family’s.” She smiled whimsically. “It was a bold move in those depression years, before the war. He managed to keep his head above water, which infuriated my father even more. I think at that point Dad would’ve taken pleasure in seeing Louis fail.” She paused and closed her eyes for a moment, as though to gather her strength.

“Then the war came and Louis joined the army. Before he left for England he came to the house. I thought he was there to see my father. Can you imagine my surprise when he said I was the one he’d come to see? He told me he was going overseas and he asked if I’d be willing to write him. Naturally I told him I would be, and then he did the strangest thing.”

When Ruth didn’t immediately continue, Julia prompted her. “What did he do?”

Ruth shook her head. “It was such a little thing and so very sweet, so much like Louis. He took my hand and kissed it.”

Her grandmother’s gaze fell to her hand, as if she still felt the imprint of his lips.

“As I look back on it,” Ruth went on, “I realize that was when I lost my heart to Louis. You see, I don’t believe he ever expected to return from the war. He loved me then, he told me much later, and had for a long time, but Louis was afraid Dad would never approve of him as my husband.”

“How long was he away?”

“I didn’t see him for three years, although I heard from him regularly. I treasured his letters and reread them so often I nearly wore them out. By the time he came home I was so deeply in love with him, nothing else mattered. My family knew how I felt and I feared the worst when Dad insisted on accompanying me to meet Louis’s train.”

“What happened?”

Ruth’s smile was weak, but happy. “Dad offered to merge his business with Louis’s. Even though Louis himself had been away, his small company had survived the war. Louis accepted, with the stipulation that both the company and I take on his name.” She smiled again. “It was a…unique proposal. My father agreed without much hesitation—and I agreed with none at all. We were married less than a month later.”