Sophie's Path

Sophie was struck by the emptiness of the place. There was hardly any furniture. In the study alcove was a desk, chair and computer. A printer and a small television set. There were no sofas, chairs, tables or lamps in the living room and no dining table. Just bar stools. The condo’s kitchen was a cook’s dream, with a six-burner gas stove, double convection ovens, dishwasher, a double-wide Sub-Zero refrigerator, a six-foot-tall wine cooler with glass doors and yards of granite countertop. However, except for an espresso machine and a commercial-grade juicer, there was nothing on the counters. No knickknacks, no canisters. It was as if he’d just moved in, but she didn’t see packing boxes anywhere.

Obviously, Jack put all his energy into his business and his employees. He hadn’t done much for himself at all. In that way, they were very much alike.

Jack lumbered over to one of the bar stools and sat down. He rubbed his injured ankle and then put his elbows on the tortoiseshell granite countertop. “So. I’m good. You can leave.”

Sophie stuck her hand on her hip. “I’m going as soon as you eat something.”

He shook his head. “Will this nightmare never end?”

Sophie went to the stainless steel Sub-Zero refrigerator and opened the door. The shelves were filled with carrots, turnips, kale, spinach, tomatoes, cucumbers, lemons, limes, apricots, peaches and berries. She saw almond milk, coconut milk, protein powder, protein shakes and an entire shelf of vitamins.

“You keep your vitamins in the fridge?”

He slid his arms across the counter and laid his head on them. “Just give me one of my power drinks.”

Sophie clucked her tongue as she pulled out a vanilla shake and popped the pull tab. She handed it to him. “There’s no garlic in that refrigerator.”

“I don’t like garlic,” he said, taking the drink and chugging it.

“What kind of guy doesn’t like garlic? Every Italian dish my grandmother taught me has garlic. It’s a food group all its own.”

He slammed the can down on the counter. “I don’t like Italian food, either.”

Sophie cleared her throat. “I can see you’ll be okay. Get some rest and don’t forget your appointments on Monday.” She took her car keys out of her pocket and headed for the staircase.

Just as she reached the newel post, she looked back. He was staring at the counter and not at her. “Jack. I’m sorry about Aleah.”

Jack’s face contorted with pain, anger and sorrow. “Please, Sophie. Just leave.”

She rushed down the stairs and out of the garage. As she started her car, she realized she was crying. Her tears flowed like a dam that had burst. From the moment the accident victims had been brought into the ER, Sophie had checked her emotions. She’d kept her mind on her work and the duties she needed to perform in the moment. She and the other team members lived in a bubble during events like that. There was no past and no future. Only the instant. A tiny fraction of time where souls were suspended between the life on earth and the world after this one. The decisions she made had been critical. And everlasting.

Was Jack right?

Had she made the wrong choice about Aleah? If she’d stayed with her, if they’d done tests or performed the thoracentesis sooner, would that have made a difference? Would they have gained another five or ten minutes that might have allowed the defibrillator to do its job?

Was Nate correct that Aleah was likely anorexic? Were her electrolytes to blame for her heart attack? Was it true that she’d never had a chance in the first place?

Sophie drove out of the wooded glen and back to the road that led to town. She turned left instead of right so she could drive around the lake. The lake helped her collect her thoughts. Often, after a particularly hard day of surgeries, if she couldn’t run the lake trails, she would at least drive around it to clear her mind. The water, whether choppy or placid, gray or crystal blue calmed her. But not today.

Today, Sophie didn’t feel much like giving thanks or praise. Her heart was as heavy as Jack Carter’s. She wondered if one of the reasons he’d urged her to leave so quickly was because he wanted to drown himself in tears just as she was doing.

* * *

IT HAD BEEN two weeks since Aleah’s death and today was the first day Sophie had felt like stepping beyond the boundaries of the hospital or her apartment.

She sat on a red-leather-and-chrome fifties-style stool at the lunch counter at Lou’s Diner, sipping an iced tea while she waited for her lunch. She liked the former train car that had been turned into a retro diner years ago. In the next car over was The LTD, also run by Lou, which served gourmet meals that made Sophie drool just reading the menu. She’d only eaten in The LTD once. That was the night of her graduation, when she’d received her RN. Her father had been healthy then and her mother was electric with pride. Even her Italian grandmother, who spoke little English, agreed to eat in an American restaurant. It had been a hallmark day for the Mattuchi family.

Sophie tried to remember what dreams she’d had for herself then. Mostly, she’d just been happy to be done with finals and evaluations.

However, she must have had some ambition because she’d only worked for a year at Grand Rapids Hospital before she realized she wanted more. She’d decided to specialize in cardiac surgery. She went back to school to get her master’s degree in nursing science and then she entered a highly competitive fellowship program to specialize in cardiovascular care. During her placement, she often felt she was only a half-step behind the heart surgeons she worked alongside. Until she returned home to Indian Lake. Once she started working with Nate Barzonni, she realized that there truly were gifted, intuitive talents in every field. Nate was a virtuoso. A genius. He could have written his own ticket to the country’s top hospitals, but Nate had decided the fast lane was not for him. He spent nearly as much of his time working at a free clinic on an Indian reservation as he did in the high-tech ablation unit at Indian Lake Hospital.

Still, Sophie supposed that Nate’s main reason for setting up shop in Indian Lake was Maddie Strong—now his wife. Sophie grimaced, remembering how she’d literally thrown herself at him when he’d first moved back to town. She had decided that to win Nate Barzonni, she’d attempt a makeover. Granted, her initial thoughts were veering down the right path because she’d needed to make changes. But she should have realized that her tactics had “disaster” written all over them.

Sophie had chopped off her hair and streaked it blond to look as much like Maddie Strong as possible, since Maddie had been Nate’s type when they were in high school. She went on a diet and lost eight pounds. She bought new clothes and fell back on her old standby—flirting.

But Nate was a one-woman man and he’d chosen Maddie.

Rightfully so. Maddie was the best woman, a fact that Sophie had known all along.

The following spring, Sophie flung a bit of caution to the wind and—not coyly—made a pass at Nate’s brother, Gabe. Gabe was very forthright and told her he just wasn’t into her. Little did she know that a few months later he and Liz Crenshaw would be married. Frankly, at the time, she didn’t think Gabe knew Liz at all. In fact, Sophie could almost claim that if it hadn’t been for the Mattuchi family selling Gabe part of their vineyard, Gabe and Liz might never have gotten together at all. Now, they were expecting their first baby.

Yep, I learned my lesson all right. It was time to get her act together. But in the right way.

A waitress dressed in a blue-and-white-striped uniform with a white pinafore apron delivered a cheeseburger and fries.

It had been over half a year since Sophie had ordered a meal that contained double the calories she now consumed each day. But she hadn’t ever been responsible for someone dying on her watch before, either.

Two thousand calories? Who cared? Maybe she’d have apple pie à la mode for dessert.

She was just about to squirt mustard on the burger when she heard a woman’s voice say her name.

“Sophie? Is that you?”

Sophie twisted around on the stool. Oh, no. It was Katia Stanislaus. The most gorgeous creature God ever built. Just looking at Katia’s svelte figure, dressed in a gray linen sheath dress, matching gray pumps and some exotic designer purse Sophie guessed cost three times her car payment, caused her to clench her teeth. She glanced down at her burger and fries. She could already feel the lead they’d form in her belly. She plopped the bun down and wiped her fingers on the paper napkin.

“Katia! Hi!” Sophie wondered if she sounded cheerful enough.

Katia was several years older than Sophie, but Sophie remembered when Katia was named Indian Lake High School Homecoming Queen. Track Queen. Yearbook Queen, but not Prom Queen. Katia had left town abruptly right before prom. Katia was one of those women who grew more beautiful with the years. Sophie would have liked to blame her own hard work for the fine lines around her eyes that Katia didn’t have. But Katia was a steamroller in the insurance business. She’d heard everyone from Maddie to Olivia Melton praise Katia’s work ethic.

Katia glided right over to Sophie and sat on the stool next to her. She glanced at Sophie’s lunch. “How’s the iced tea?”

Sophie smiled wanly. She’d have to add merciful to Katia’s attributes. “Good. Not as good as Olivia’s raspberry herb tea at the deli.”

Katia laughed.

Her voice sounded like tinkling chimes. No wonder Austin McCreary melted when she blew into town last fall. What man could resist her?

Now that Katia was back in Indian Lake, amazingly, she and Sophie had become reacquainted. Actually, if it hadn’t been for Katia, Sophie would probably still be apartment-hunting. Katia had been on the verge of vacating Mrs. Beabots’s apartment in order to move into Austin’s house while they planned the wedding, when Sophie overheard Maddie Barzonni and Sarah Bosworth at Cupcakes and Coffee discussing Mrs. Beabots’s soon-to-be-vacant apartment.

Several years ago, right after Sophie moved back to Indian Lake from Grand Rapids, her father had been diagnosed with cancer and Sophie had moved into the family home near the Crenshaw Vineyard on the north of town to help her mother and grandmother. Sophie’s salary had also paid off a large portion of her father’s surgical and chemotherapy bills. The family had been deeply grateful, but once her father recovered, Sophie couldn’t wait to be out on her own again.

Once she’d heard about Mrs. Beabots’s apartment, Sophie knew if she didn’t snatch the place that afternoon, she’d miss out. Indian Lake was not like any other town in the northern hemisphere. There was little to no new construction, no apartment buildings, very few condos and no place for young people to move to except their parents’ basements. Until the town experienced an uptick in new business or manufacturing, residential construction would remain at a standstill.

Sophie was struck by how such an economic situation could affect the younger generations of Indian Lake. Unless they relocated far from home, it was as if they were all stuck in a vat of molasses. Fleetingly, she wondered if this inertia, this lack of “normal” growth into adulthood, had any effect on the rising drug problem in their town.

Katia was still beaming a megawatt smile. “So, do you mind if I sit here, or were you waiting for someone? Knowing you, the next handsome hunk walking through that door doesn’t stand a chance.”

Sophie winced. Katia wasn’t being catty or petty. She probably thought she was being complimentary. The old Sophie would have agreed with her. Bring ’em on. That had been Sophie’s motto for years. But not anymore. “Uh, I don’t think so,” Sophie replied, squirting ketchup onto the side of her plate.