Daddy Lessons

The all-too-familiar panic rose up in him as he felt himself backed into a corner. He glanced over at Natasha. She was smiling at him, rocking back and forth on the stair. He wasn’t letting her go. Never.

Mrs. Anderson was still talking. “If you aren’t responsible enough to take care of her schooling, perhaps we will have to—”

“I’m getting a tutor,” he snapped, cutting her off mid-threat. He leaned back against the wall behind him, the old cliché of being stuck between a rock and a hard place suddenly becoming very real. Could he hire Hailey? See her every day?

Maybe there was another way. Someone else to tutor Natasha.

“I see.” Mrs. Anderson’s clipped tone showed him that he had, for now, caused her to retreat. “Then I guess we’ll have to see how things pan out for her.”

“Yes, we will.” Dan experienced a momentary reprieve and, to his disappointment, one of his knees began to bounce, an involuntary reaction to stress. He pushed it down and forced a smile that came more naturally this time. “And now I’m saying goodbye.” He ended the call before Mrs. Anderson could ask to speak to Natasha again.

He laid his head back against the wall, closing his eyes.

“Are you tired, Daddy?” Natasha asked him, tugging on his hand.

He looked down at her, feeling the weight of his responsibilities. He was tired. Tired of trying to balance all the emotions his homecoming had created. Tired of trying to do it all himself.

In spite of what he had told Natasha’s grandmother, however, he wasn’t sure he was ready to have Hailey tutor his daughter every day. Surely he could find someone else to do the job.

“No, honey. I’m fine.” He dropped his phone in his pocket and took her hand. “Now, let’s go see if Gramma needs any help.”

Hailey smoothed her hair, pressed her lips together and then caught herself mid-preen as she walked out of the cloakroom. It’s church, silly. And like last week, Dan won’t be here anyway.

In spite of her self-chiding, she still tugged on the wide leather belt cinching her knit dress, pressed her lips together to even out her lipstick, then threaded her way through the people gathered in the foyer, toward the doors leading to the sanctuary.

She paused in the doorway, glancing around the church, looking for a place to sit. Shannon was working at the hospital this morning and her Nana wanted to sleep in, so neither of them would be here this morning.

She caught sight of her cousin Carter’s dark head bent over his fiancée, Emma, her son, Adam, sitting on his lap. People sat on either side of them, so it didn’t look like there was room for her there.

“Miss Deacon. Miss Deacon,” Natasha’s voice called out over the buzz of conversation from the lobby. Hailey’s heart skipped its next beat.

She turned to see Dan’s tall figure moving through the people gathered in the foyer. His dark blond hair still glistened with moisture, as if he had stepped right out of the shower, gotten dressed and come here. As Natasha pulled him closer she also saw a line of blood trickling from a cut on his cheek. Probably shaved as quickly as he had dressed.

“Miss Deacon, you come to church too?” Natasha asked, beaming with pleasure.

“Yes. I do.” Hailey returned her smile, yet couldn’t stop her eyes from drifting toward Dan.

He wore a blue blazer over a light blue shirt. No tie, and jeans with cowboy boots. Just as he always did. And just as before, one point of his collar was tucked under the lapel of his blazer and the other lay overtop.

Hailey had to stop herself from reaching out to straighten it. As she always did.

“Hello, Hailey,” he said.

Hailey hoped her smile looked as polite and emotionless as his. Then she noticed the trickle of blood heading dangerously close to his collar.

“You’re bleeding,” Hailey said, pointing to his face.

Dan grimaced and lifted his hand to the wrong cheek. Without thinking Hailey pulled a tissue out of her purse and pressed it to his face. She felt the warmth of his cheek through the tissue.

Dan, however, pulled back, smearing the blood.

“Sorry. So sorry,” she said, angry at how breathless she sounded. “It’s just the blood was going to stain the collar of your shirt. I thought I should stop it. I didn’t mean—”

Stop now, she chastised herself as she handed him the tissue again.

He took it from her and slowly wiped his cheek. “I should go to the washroom and clean this up,” he said. “Would you mind watching Natasha for me?” he asked.

Hailey gave a tight shake of her head, pulling her gaze away from him. She drew in a long, careful breath. Please Lord, help me through this, she prayed. I’ll be seeing him from time to time. Just let me get my silly emotions settled down.

As Dan left, Natasha caught Hailey’s hand in hers, clinging to it. “I wanted to wear my fairy wings to church so I could look like an angel, but my Daddy said I couldn’t.”

Hailey dragged her attention from Dan’s retreating back to the little girl.

Natasha swung Hailey’s hand as if they had known each other for years instead of only a few days.

“I think you look like an angel now,” Hailey returned.

“I don’t like this dress, but my daddy said I had to wear it.” Natasha pulled at the dress, her blue cotton tied at the waist. White tights and black patent leather shoes finished the look.

“You look really nice,” Hailey said, but from the look of Natasha’s sloppy ponytail she suspected Dan hadn’t had much luck with her hair.

“My daddy said we had to hurry to get to church so we could sit with Gramma and Grandpa, but I want to sit with you,” Natasha said, looking up at Hailey.

“You better wait to see what your daddy says,” Hailey returned. Knowing the tension surrounding them each time they got together, she doubted Dan would give in to that request.

People moved past, smiling at her and Natasha. A few stopped to chat, but most walked directly into the sanctuary. Finally Dan appeared again. The cut on his cheek was only a tiny red line and seemed to have stopped bleeding.

Without looking at her, Dan reached for Natasha’s hand. “We should go, sweetie,” he said.

But Natasha wouldn’t let go of Hailey. “I want to sit with Miss Deacon.”

“I’m sure Miss Deacon has her own place to sit,” he said, motioning her forward.

But Natasha wouldn’t move.

Hailey saw Dan press his lips together and tried to release Natasha’s death grip on her own fingers. “You should go with your daddy,” she said.

Natasha’s lips thinned and she gave a quick shake of her head as she gave Hailey a determined look. “I want to sit with you.” Her voice rose on that last word and people already seated in the sanctuary were looking back at them. Some looked concerned, some grinned, and Hailey sensed Dan’s growing frustration.

Dan tried one more time to take Natasha away.

“I want to be with Miss Deacon,” she called out as Dan took her hand firmly in his.

A few more heads turned and a few titters flew around the sanctuary. And in case neither Dan nor Hailey understood Natasha’s determination, she emphasized her little pique with a stamp of her foot.

Hailey looked over Natasha’s head at Dan. “I don’t mind if you and her sit with me,” she said, giving him a gracious way to give in to Natasha.

Dan drummed his fingers on his thigh, then gave a reluctant nod of his head. “Okay. I guess we can.”