She was a little ashamed because she knew she hadn’t told Patrik the whole truth. There was one more small but very strange piece of the puzzle that she was keeping to herself. At least until she knew more.
‘Well, I certainly can’t argue with a woman’s intuition. Would you like a little more wine?’
‘Yes, please.’ Erica looked around the kitchen. ‘A nice place you have here. Did you decorate it yourself?’
‘No, I can’t take credit for that. It was Karin who was the decorating talent.’
‘Oh right, your wife Karin. What happened between the two of you, actually?’
‘Well, it was really the same old story. Girl meets dance-band singer in a waist-length jacket. Girl falls in love. Girl divorces her husband and moves in with the dance-band singer.’
‘You’re kidding!’
‘Unfortunately I’m not. It was bad enough that she dumped me. But she left me for Leif Larsson, popular singer and heartthrob in “Leffes” the most famous dance band in Bohuslän. The man with the prettiest hockey girlfriend on the west coast. Yep, there’s not much you can do to compete with a man in tasselled loafers.’
Erica looked at him wide-eyed.
Patrik smiled. ‘Well, that’s probably a somewhat exaggerated version, but something along those lines.’
‘But that must have been terrible. It couldn’t have been easy for you.’
‘I felt sorry for myself for quite a while, but it’s okay now. Not good, but okay.’
Erica changed the subject. ‘The news about Alex’s pregnancy was like a bomb going off.’ She stared hard at Patrik, and he had a feeling that there was something more behind her apparently innocent remark.
‘In any case, it seemed she hadn’t shared the good news with her husband,’ Erica said.
Patrik waited silently for her to go on. After a moment Erica appeared to have decided to continue down that path, but she spoke in a low voice, still sounding hesitant.
‘According to her best friend, Henrik isn’t the father of the child.’
Patrik raised an eyebrow and whistled, but still said nothing in the hope of more information from Erica.
‘Francine told me that Alex had met someone here in Fjällbacka. And she drove here every weekend to see him. According to Francine, Alex had never wanted to have children with Henrik, but it was different with this man. She was overjoyed about the baby, and that’s why Francine insisted so strongly that her death wasn’t suicide. In her view, Alex was happy for the first time in her life.’
‘Did she know who the man was?’
‘No, she didn’t. Alex kept that information to herself.’
‘But why would her husband put up with her driving to Fjällbacka every weekend without him? Did he know that she was meeting someone here?’
Patrik took another sip of wine and felt his cheeks beginning to flush. Whether from the wine or from Erica’s presence, he wasn’t quite sure.
‘Apparently they had a quite unusual relationship. I met Henrik in Göteborg and I got the feeling that their lives ran on parallel tracks that seldom crossed. It’s also impossible to say what he knows or doesn’t know, from the short conversation that I had with him. That man has a stone face. I think that whatever he knows, he’s very careful to keep it to himself.’
‘That type of person can sometimes be like a pressure cooker. The steam builds and builds, and one day it explodes. Do you think that’s what might have happened? That one day the rejected husband had enough, and he killed the unfaithful wife?’ Patrik asked.
‘I don’t know, Patrik. I really don’t know. But now I think we should drink more than our share of wine and talk about all sorts of things, as long as it doesn’t have to do with murder and sudden death.’
He willingly agreed and raised his glass in a toast.
They moved to the sofa and spent the rest of the evening talking comfortably about everything else under the sun. She told him about her life, about the fuss over the house and her grief over her parents. He told her about his anger and feeling of failure after his divorce, and about the frustration of finding himself at square one again, just as he was starting to feel ready for children and a family, ready to believe that he and Karin would grow old together.
Even the brief pauses in the conversation felt comfortable, and it was at those moments he had to keep himself from leaning forward and kissing Erica. He refrained, and the opportunity passed.
3
He was watching when they carried her out. He wanted to wail and throw himself over her covered body. Keep her forever.
Now she was truly gone. Strangers were going to poke and dig at her body. None of them would see her beauty the same way he had done.
For them she would only be a piece of meat. A number on paper, without life, without fire.
With his left hand he stroked the palm of his right hand. Yesterday it had caressed her arm. He pressed his palm against his cheek and tried to feel her cold skin on his face.
He felt nothing. She was gone.
Blue lights were flashing. People were rushing back and forth, in and out of the house. Why were they in a hurry? It was already too late.
No one saw him. He was invisible. He had always been invisible.
It didn’t matter. She had seen him. She could always see him. When she fixed her blue eyes on him he felt that he was seen.
Now there was nothing left. The fire had been put out long ago. He stood in the ashes and watched as his life was carried off, covered by a yellow hospital blanket. At the end of the road there were no choices. He had always been aware of that, and now the hour had finally arrived. He had been longing for it. He embraced it.
She was gone.
Nelly had sounded a bit surprised when Erica called. For a moment, Erica wondered whether she was making a mountain out of a molehill, although she still couldn’t help thinking that it was very odd for Nelly to show up at Alex’s funeral reception. Not to mention the way she had talked almost exclusively to Julia. It’s true that Karl-Erik had worked for Fabian Lorentz as the factory’s office manager until the family moved to Göteborg, but as far as Erica knew they had never associated socially. The Carlgrens were far below the Lorentz family’s requirements for acceptable social class.
The drawing room she was ushered into was exquisitely beautiful. The view stretched from the harbour at one end to the open horizon beyond the islands at the other. On a winter day like this, when the sunshine was reflecting off the snow-covered ice, the view could compete with even the sunniest summertime panorama.
They sat down on an elegant sofa group and Erica was served small canapés from a silver tray. They were fantastic, but she tried to control her appetite so she wouldn’t look unrefined. Nelly ate only one. Afraid to add a gram of flesh to those knobbly bones.
The conversation flowed slowly but politely. In the long pauses between the words, only the ticking of a clock could be heard along with the dainty slurping as they sipped their hot tea. They kept the topics of conversation neutral. The flight of young people from Fjällbacka. The lack of work. How distressing it was that more and more of the lovely old homes were being bought up by tourists and turned into summer houses. Nelly talked a little about how it used to be, when she came to Fjällbacka as a young woman, newly married. Erica listened attentively, politely asking a question now and then.
It felt as if they were circling round the subject they both knew that they would have to broach sooner or later.
It was Erica who finally got up the courage.
‘Well, the last time we saw each other it was under rather sad circumstances.’
‘Yes, so tragic. Such a young woman.’
‘I didn’t realize that you knew the Carlgrens so well.’
‘Karl-Erik worked for us for many years, and of course we met his family on numerous occasions. It seemed only right to express my condolences in person.’ Nelly lowered her eyes. Erica saw that her hands were fidgeting nervously in her lap.
‘I got the impression that you also knew Julia. She wasn’t even born when the Carlgrens lived in Fjällbacka, was she?’