The Cowboy's Holiday Blessing

“Let go of me.” She turned, fire sparking in those hazel-green eyes of hers.

“I’ll let go, but you’re not going to blame me for not knowing about you.” He’d made a lot of mistakes that he’d had to own up to. He sure wouldn’t have walked out on a kid.

He would have claimed his kid if he’d known about her. If it was possible that she was his, he’d do everything he could for her. But she wasn’t his. He was pretty sure of that.

“Yeah, well, you do kind of have something to do with my life and not being in it,” she shot back at him, her chin hiking up a few notches and a spark in those eyes that dared him to tell her otherwise.

“I didn’t know where your mother went to, and she never tried to get in touch.” He had let go of her arm and they stood in the center of the living room, facing off.

“Yeah, well…” Jade stared at him, her eyes big in a little-girl face. Man, she was a tough kid. He didn’t know what to do. He could hug her. Or he could just stand there and stare. He didn’t think she’d want either.

“Well, what?”

“Well, you coulda tried.” Her bottom lip started to tremble. “Haven’t you heard of the internet?”

“If I’d known, I would have searched the whole world to find a kid of mine.” He softened his tone and took a step forward.

“Yeah, right. My mom said you told her once that you never planned on having kids and so she didn’t bother telling you that you had one.”

“That was real nice of her to do that.” He wasn’t going to say anything against her mother. The kid had gone through enough, and he didn’t know Gloria well enough to say much more.

She reached for his hand. “I didn’t think you’d be so old.”

“Well, thanks, Jade. Is Jade short for something?”

“Just Jade.” She had hold of his hand. He looked at her hand in his, small and strong. Yeah, he would have been okay with having her for a kid.

The toast popped out of the toaster and coffee poured into a cup from the single-cup brewer on his counter. Jackson Cooper had the kitchen of her dreams. It didn’t seem fair that he had her coffeemaker, the replica of a vintage stove and fridge she’d always dreamed of, granite countertops and light pine floors. But really, what was fair?

Life? Most often not. She’d learned that at an early age. She’d put away the baggage of her past years ago, when she realized carrying it around weighed a person down. If a person meant to let go of their burdens, they shouldn’t pack them back up and heft them over their shoulder.

She pulled toast from the toaster and buttered it. From the dining room she could hear Jackson talking to the teenager who had knocked on her door just over an hour ago. A few minutes later they walked into the kitchen and their likeness floored Madeline. The two had the same strong cheekbones, the same strong mouth, and eyes that matched. Jade’s hair was lighter.

Jackson walked to the sink and ran water into a glass. Madeline stood next to the counter, feeling out of place in this mess of his and even more out of place in his home. This wasn’t where she’d expected to end up today, in Jackson Cooper’s kitchen, in his life. When she woke up this morning, it had been like any other Friday. She’d been looking forward to the weekend and decorating her house for Christmas. Jackson hadn’t figured into her plans. Ever.

She’d lived in Dawson for over a year, and even though it was a small town, she didn’t run in the same circles as Jackson Cooper. Every now and then he flirted with her at the Mad Cow Café. But Jackson flirted with everyone.

“You made toast.” Jackson set the glass down on the counter.

“I did, and the coffee is ready.” She dried her hands and watched as he shook two pills into his hand, popped them into his mouth and washed them down with water.

“Are you eating?” He pushed a plate in her direction.

“I had a granola bar.” She pushed it back. “You need something in your stomach.”

“Right.” He glanced at the girl that she’d delivered to his front door. “There’s cinnamon and sugar in the cabinet if you want it for your toast. After we eat we’ll figure this mess out.”

Jade carried her plate to the table and sat down. “I don’t know what you need to figure out. Fourteen years ago, you messed up.” She shot him a look and flapped her arms like wings. “Your roosters have come home to roost.”

“Great, she’s a smart-mouth to boot,” he grumbled as he picked up a slice of toast.

He took a bite and glanced out the window. He didn’t sit down. Instead he stood next to Madeline, his hip against the counter. His arm brushed hers. Of course he would be comfortable in his own skin. He wouldn’t feel the need for space.

She stepped away from him, picking up a pan that had been next to the sink. Not her pan. Not her mess. She grabbed a scrubber and turned on hot water. Jackson rinsed his plate and opened the dishwasher.

“You don’t have to wash that.” He touched her arm.

“I don’t mind washing it.” She rinsed the pan and stuck it in the dish drainer. She glanced out the window again. The land here rolled gently and was dotted with trees. Cattle grazed and a few horses were chasing each other in a circle, bucking and kicking as wind picked up leaves.

“Can she stay with you?”

“Excuse me?” Madeline glanced in Jade’s direction and turned her attention back to Jackson.

“Look, Maddie…”

She lifted a hand to stop him. “My name is Madeline.”

“Sure, okay, Madeline. I need to work this out and you can’t leave a kid here with a single man, not when you aren’t sure if that single man is her father. And I don’t really want my family to know about this, not yet.”

“So you want to hide her at my house?” She tapped her foot on the light pine floor and fought the urge to slug him.

“Not hide her. She needs to stay somewhere and she can’t really stay here, not until we know exactly what’s going on.”

As much as she didn’t want to, she got it. She also kind of admired him for thinking about the girl. They could call the police or family services, but then she’d end up in state custody. Jade definitely couldn’t stay alone with him, a single man. What if she wasn’t his? Even if she was, there were things to consider.

She glanced across the room at Jade and she remembered that first night, fourteen and alone in the Montana town she’d rarely visited as a kid. Frightened because she had fifty dollars and no one to turn to, she remembered flashing lights at a convenience store and being driven to a group home.

Fear knotted in her stomach, the way it had then, half a lifetime ago.

“Yes, she can stay with me for a little while.”

Jackson watched her, his eyes narrowing. “You sure?”

“Yes, I’m sure.”

“I’ll pay you.” His mouth shifted into a smile, revealing a dimple in his chin.

“Pay me?”

“For letting her stay with you. I can write you a check or pay you cash.”

Madeline glanced at her watch. “I really have to go, and I don’t want your money.”

“There will be the expense of feeding her. She probably needs clothes. I need to pay you something.”

Jade stood, the quick movement catching Madeline’s attention, and from the jerk of his head in that direction, Jackson’s also. The girl held her plate, trembling a little.

“Stop, okay? I’m a kid, not something you trade off or try to get rid of. I thought it would be different…” Jade bit down on her bottom lip and looked from Madeline to Jackson. “You were supposed to be different.”