Wishes

WISHES AS THE ENGINE OF LIFE

“We are such stuff as dreams are made on, and our little life is rounded with a sleep.”

William Shakespeare

Wishes are our actual strength throughout our life.

Since birth, we come into this world as hollow creatures who are not self-aware and who do not have any conscience about the surrounding reality.

Like any other life form on Earth, the very first part of our existence is completely dominated by our instinct of survival.

This goes also for minerals.

Despite their lack of what from a biological point of view we would call “life”, they struggle continuously to earn their place in the universe and in our existence.

Even among our cells and atoms there is a sort of unconscious instinct of preservation, despite their being part of anindivisibile entirety.

The newborn unconsciously cares about his own survival, the lowest step of the pyramid that Abraham Maslow thought of to represent the hierarchy of human needs in the quest for individual self-fulfilment.

These steps represent the phases of self-fulfilment and in order to reach the top – that is, the maximum degree of an individual’s realization – one must go through the first, most basic and essential stop up until the last one.

At the base of the pyramid are physiological needs such as hunger, thirst, and sleep.

Then, the needs for security and protection; on the third level stays the need for belonging, affection, family.

On the fourth, the need for respect, prestige and success, while the last step deals about one’s self-realization.

Each need, in order to be fulfilled, requires a particular kind of energy, that we call “wish” or “desire”.

The man will never reach self-fulfilment nor will he cover a prominent role in absence of desire.

If one does not wish for it, he will not even be able to have a family, be surrounded by love or rather feel safe.

As a matter of fact, as far as survival is concerned, desires are automatic and unconscious so that every individual can firmly wish to live before anything else.

Think of sexuality.

Nature made sure that sex could provide everyone with emotion and pleasure of such intensity that it is somehow difficult to renounce it.

All of this comes in the wider picture of the preservation of the species.

Let us go back to our newborn baby.

There will be a moment in the overwhelming tide of information he gets – and that inevitably contribute to mold his own representation of the outside world and of himself – when his personality will begin to take shape.

Personality is the peculiarity that gives uniqueness to that person.

What emerges then through personality, game, through the baby trying the express himself in the context he’s put into?

How does he deal with his whole existence?

Through desire.

Desires originate as the engine of individual existence.

They are born as intentions and they simultaneously develop through intension.

Thus, each of my wishes or desiresis an intention and throughout my whole existence I constantly long for something.

This may sound weird but it actually reflects reality.

We tend to think of desires as something big and imposing, something almost unfeasible or rather unreachable, something we must struggle to get.

Actually, our entire life is based on and is studded with a variety of desires: the wish to appear in a certain way, the wish to be, the wish to act, try or seek; the wish to believe, to create, to know, to possess, and so forth.

This is easily reflected in the way children play, the moment when desires are eager to emerge continuously.

On the other hand, adults tend to conceal their “world of desires” despite their tendency to long for something is far from disappeared.

They manifest only what they judge convenient or suitable for the situation and the people around them in that particular moment.

We can define desire as the engine that drives our being towards directions we choose for ourselves, based upon what we long for.

Wishes pushes people to act.

It determines behaviour and so does the counterpart of desire, that is, what we wish not to happen.

That is a wish as well, and its defined as a negative one as it is something we do not want to come true.

Moreover, it pushes us towards certain situations in order to achieve fulfilment.

Even though this may sound weird, that is exactly what happens quite often.

The fact of thinking about things we don’t want to happen and constantly examining them makes our subconscious take us seriously.

This is because it just acts upon our orders, without judging them: if you remember the crew metaphor, the crew does not argue.

It just acts upon the captain’s orders without questioning.

Hence the importance of giving the right orders, a topic we will deal with later.

Each of our actions is always pushed by desire.

If desire wasn’t there, we would simply not act at all.

It is clear then that we are not pushed by ANY desire, but only by that or those of greater intensity.

When it comes to the issue of the intensity of desire, the questions we should ask ourselves are whether life is continuously permeated by desire or not and what contributes to make our wishes – from the simplest to the most difficult one – to become reality, or better said, OUR reality.