Born Weird

“Luce! Listen! I believe her!”

“Oh you do not.”

“I’m starting to,” Angie said. She looked up at her sister. She wished everything didn’t always have to be so hard. “Ask yourself. Have you ever been lost?”

“I have a natural sense of direction.”

“Exactly. And I’ve let almost everybody I’ve ever met walk all over me.”

“That’s not just low self-esteem?”

“She’s charged me with collecting all of us and bringing everyone to her hospital room so that at the moment of her death she can lift the curses.”

“She gave you—a quest?”

“Don’t mock me.”

“Don’t be mockable.”

“Thirteen days …”

“You’re really taking this seriously?”

“It seemed like a lot of time but now it doesn’t.”

“Does anyone know where Kent is?”

“That seems like enough time? Right?” Angie asked. She looked at her sister and saw a mixture of pity and skepticism. “You think I’ve gone crazy.”

“No. No. It’s just big. That’s all. A lot to take in.”

“There were ladies falling unconscious and nurses rushing in and then the lights dimmed. She grabbed my arm and she wrote her phone number on it and I still can’t wash it off. Our plane was on fire! We had to make an emergency landing. We were all going to die! And then I called the number! I agreed to do it! Then the plane landed safely!”

“Do you want some tea? I have the kettle on.”

“Are you hearing this?”

“Do you really believe that the plane would have crashed if you hadn’t called the Shark?”

“I think … yes, I do.”

“Angie, that’s called magical thinking. You’ve always been prone to it. The whole family has. It’s okay, but it’s a certifiable mental illness. It’s in all the textbooks.”

“You think it’s just a coincidence that we were forced to land in Winnipeg?”

“I think it even has its own drug now,” Lucy said.

Neither sister said anything more. Angie swallowed several times. She bit the inside of her cheek. She tried to take deep breaths. But none of it worked. The tears came. Angie started to sob.

“I’m not going to do it just because you’re crying.”

“I’m s … s … sorry. I’m not trying t … oo. I’m trying rea … lly hard n … ot to,” Angie said. She wiped her nose with her sleeve. Slightly revolted, Lucy retrieved a box of Kleenex, which she handed to her sister. Angie blew her nose but her chest still heaved.

“I lost my job today,” Lucy said. “I got caught fucking a stranger in front of the 813s.”

“No w … ay!”

“I did.”

“Just like … when you … worked at F … f … rosty Queen?”

“Yes.”

“And … at … I … deal Coffee … and Cinnamon … To … Go?”

“No need to make a list.”

“But don’t you … th … ink … that’s too … coinci … dental? You getting fired … today?”

“It doesn’t mean anything, Angie.”

“Okay,” Angie said. She blew her nose again. She took several deep breaths but then she started sobbing again.

“Oh Jesus Christ,” Lucy said. “I’ll go see Abba.”

“Really? You … will?”

“Only because we should have done it a long time ago.”

“Thank you, Lucy. That … means … so … m … uch.”

“I can’t believe that still works.”

“It’s … because … you have … a good … heart.”

“Too bad for me.”

“But y … ou’ll really … go?”

“Yes, yes. I just said I would. I’ll go as far as Abba,” Lucy said. Angie nodded. She pushed herself out of the white armchair and moved across the room, lowering herself onto Lucy’s chair, sitting half beside her sister and half on top of her. She turned herself sideways so she could hug Lucy.

“Watch my shirt.”

“This … means … so … much … to … me.”

“Careful with your nose. Here, blow. Everything’s going to be okay. There’s just one thing we’ll have to do first.”

“What is it?”